Friday, September 26, 2008

Eggs, Existentialism, and Egos...

It's been a while since I posted my last entry. I need to keep better track of my blog (and reading all my friend's blogs).

I really like fried eggs. Random, I know. Today is my dad's birthday, and my mama's good to him. She made him, my entire family (including a seminary student) breakfast. We had eggs, bacon, home fries (with onions, peppers, and tomatoes), and toast. I love all of them, but mostly eggs. I don't know what it is, but I truly LOVE eggs. They always make me happy and make me remember the olden days (in my family), when we used to have eggs almost every Saturday morning. Now I'm lucky if I eat eggs once a month. Sure, they work their way into recipes and such, but nothing is as good as a plain-ol' fried egg. Mmmmmmm.

In my AP Lit class we've been doing a unit on Existentialism. My mom's not happy, mainly because I have become slightly indifferent about certain things now, and I kinda just do what I want to do when I fell like it. My teacher laughed when I told him the subtle changes I've started to notice since beginning The Stranger. He wonders if it's possible to have an Existentialistic Mormon (Mormonism and Existentialism...hmmm). Anyway, the book I've been reading, The Stranger, is a great book. I recommend it to anyone who wishes to step out of their comfort zone and take on this challenging story. There are a few (mainly only three) parts I edited for myself, and if you want to read it I would ask you to ask me which parts you'll need to skip.

I'm not egotistical, but I do sometimes seem very narcissistic. I like how I look, generally, I like my cute dimple (yes singular, I only really have one), I like my eyes, I like my laugh, and I like to smile. I do not like my smile right now (due to the metal in the mouth), but I do enjoy making others happy by smiling. All this was brought on by my choir practice on Wednesday. The male voices (comprised of the Tenors, Basses, and Baritones) went to do a sectional under the direction of our student section leaders. There are two section leaders for the three groups, but miraculously one of them took charge, again, unfortunately. He made many errors throughout the entire rehearsal but there are four main things that infuriated me:
1.) He yelled at ME! Someone asked me a question, and I said THREE words. There was a room full of people and he singled me out.
2.) he mocked me for being in the wrong spot. I am currently trading between two parts in choir, I'm switching between 1st Tenor and Baritone. That is not easy in and of itself, not to mention that I also have to remember with which section I need to be during each piece. I forgot that I was supposed to trade sections, so he told me that I need to not be so forgetful and just move because I was making him mess up his notes.
3.) He took charge. There are two section leaders, and he should have shared the power.
4.) He was toying with the tempo. That's the conductor's business. Not to mention, he took it very slow the first ten times we sang through the piece, then he sped the tempo up too much. He was confusing everyone in the room.
If I weren't a Senior with eight years of choir experience under my large belt, I would love to just quit. But I only have months left, so I'm not going to lose sleep over it.

I had my Senior pictures taken yesterday. I absolutely LOVED Hilton Photography Studios. My sister had her pictures done there, so my mom and I decided to go there again. The photographers were great, and I loved the flexibility that they gave me with the styles, etc. I highly recommend, to anyone living in MA to consider letting Hilton photograph their children. It was a great studio. Maybe my experience would've been different if I didn't have a very attractive young woman taking my pictures. But, anyway, I loved the whole experience, and I'm sure I will share pictures (after I pick which ones I want) with y'all.

Saturday, September 20, 2008

School, Science, Split...BOOM!

So my life is like a giant pot of pasta right now. Everything was starting to become great and rather comfortable in my life when everything was stirred and churned.
School has started. Fun, NOT! I enjoy all of my classes and most of them are very interesting. I'm currently taking AP Literature, AP Spanish Language, Band, Chorus, P.E., and Chemistry. AP Lit is great class for me because I am able to delve into books to a depth I was not able to do in any previous English class. AP Spanish is just fun, sometimes. We do a lot of skits, we read a lot of stories, and we get to learn Spanish in a fun environment. Band and Chorus are interesting (like always), and they allow me to learn and grow in many different ways. Update!!! I'm now 4th chair (out of 7) and that's great because last year I was 7th out of 8 (also I forgot to practice for my audition so I could have been 3rd if I'd only practiced). Now Chemistry. I am the only Senior in my chem class, mainly because my old guidance counselor told me to take whatever science I wanted to take my junior year, so I took Anatomy and Physiology instead of Chemistry. My class is awkward because my entire class is filled with weird kids and they NEVER TALK!!! If you really know me, you know that I utter silence (in public places). I like it when classes are engaging and fun, but this one is neither. I am generally the first one to give an answer, whether I'm right or wrong, and so my classmates not only think I'm weird, but most of them believe I am slightly stupid. My teacher understands that I'm actually (I'm not being proud...) one of the smartest kids in the class. I understand all of the material faster than almost all the other students, and I know a fare share about Chemicals and Elements (more than the rest of the class). I'm okay with everyone thinking me a fool, as long as the teacher knows who the real smart kids are...;-]
Now the most recent, and slightly more traumatic change in my life. So, my old Young Men's Presidency was released and a new one was called, it was great, but I'll miss my old leader. That wasn't the traumatic change; however, my ward being split into two units was. Last Sunday my ward, the Franklin Ward, was split into the "Franklin 1st Ward" and "Franklin 2nd Branch". All of my good friends from my quorum are not in the Ward with me, and most of my leaders and friends are no longer with me either. It's very upsetting being taken away from all those that I've lived, grown, and been accustomed to for the past 10 years. I know that this is what Heavenly Father and Christ want right now, but it is hard to just swallow it and move on.
Now I'm starting to settle in and become used to the sea of change that's around me. I only hope that things won't be too weird in church tomorrow.

Monday, August 25, 2008

Fiends and Friends

Sometimes friends are not friends. Sometimes friends are fiends and they do things that are absolutely malicious. I wonder how children raised by generally good people can be so rude and thoughtless towards others.

If everyone in the world actually listened to each other, without ignoring what they're really saying, what would the world be like?

I would like it if people didn't accept friends like they do car offers, OBO (or better offers). My parents have raised me to treat others with respect and be a man of my word, to follow through with commitments. I it when people break commitments and I also people who don't honor their word, people who aren't honest...people who don't have integrity. I like it when my friends are with me, but when they make plans with others after making plans with me, I generally just say it's OK. Not anymore! I will not let others walk all over me and take advantage of me. I have changed this summer, I'm trying to be more honest about how I feel and what I think.

A good thing did happen today. I fixed my schedule and got to see a lot of my friends at school. That made me happy. But then I got home and discovered that some of my church friends, who must inherently be stupid, treated my brother like a bad offer on a car. They found a better offer of entertainment, so they disregarded his offer. I just wanted to go over there and beat the snot out of them, or ask their parents why their children are so rude.

I wish that other teenage boys could just understand that despite their lack of emotions and feeling, others still have feelings. Some teenage boys, mainly the ones in my ward, are generally emotion retarded, literally. They are slow to understand emotions, and I don't think they
really care. Frankly their immaturity, idiocy, and unorganized natures make me want to vomit sometimes...

Siovhan tells me that someday I will be appreciated by people other than my family. I'm anxiously awaiting that day. She told me that at BYU, you can be yourself all the time and that people are OK with that. I having my "school Braden" and "church Braden". I want my church friends to accept the fact that I like to know things, I like to learn. I want my school friends to know that I love my religion with all my heart and soul, and that I cannot live without being, as they call me, "Mormon Braden". I just wish life wasn't so complicated and that things were easier for me sometimes. I know that I need to go through Hell to get to Heaven, and that hopefully I'll be blessed for all my many trials.
-B

Sunday, August 24, 2008

The Long Month...Crash

So it's been a while since I last posted anything. I'll do an update and a little bit of babbling...I'm a little emotional (school starts soon).

After my last post I didn't do much. Mom, Ben, and Mikaela left before the last week of July to go out to Utah, so I was home with my dad. It was nice being alone for a little while. I went to Especially for Youth (efy) in Amherst, MA and I had a blast! it was seriously the best efy I've ever been to, and I learned so much and had a lot of humbling, spiritual moments. I really liked the female counselor in my group...she was more mature than the male counselor i was assigned to, and she was very nice (she listened to me which is hard to do). I met some wonderful people that live relatively close to me, so i can stay in contact with them, maybe i'll even be able to have a little reunion or something.

After i got back form efy i went through some awful efy withdrawals. I was depressed and moped-around all day Saturday and Sunday. Then I spent the week reading my books for the Advanced Placement Literature class I'm attempting to get into. I didn't get very far, but I finished one. Then that Friday (8/8/08) I was driving home after being with the Elders in our ward all day and I totaled my dad's Volvo S70. I rear-ended someone going about 10 m.p.h. But that scar's still a little tender.

I flew out to Utah that Tuesday night. I had a 9-hour layover in Dallas Airport, and when I got to Utah it was noon-ish. I went to Siovhan's apartment to pack all of her belongings into my grandpa's truck, then go to meet with a BYU admissions counselor to talk about the admissions process and such. He was impressed with everything that I was juggling, and said that i was a shoe-in...HA! He said that i was a
very strong candidate...so i hope he was being brutally honest. After that i went to Nephi to visit the grandparents. Thursday of that week was Siovhan's graduation (Step 1), and that was long...but worthwhile. Richard G. Scott gave a speech after being awarded and honorary Doctorate, and he talked about the steps to true success in life (will be posted after i find the notes i took). It was wonderful, and also the speech given by a wonderfully bright English major was magnificent. I don't know how else to describe it! We had a party at her complex where we rented "The Lodge" so that everyone could come and back in Siovhan's many success. Siovhan's CFAC convocation (College of Fine Arts and Communications) was absolutely amazing (Step 2). There was a speech given about Journalism, Advertising, Movie Production, and Graphic Arts majors and how exciting and amazing they all are. There were some music majors who did a trio with a violin, oboe, and piano...that was marvelous. It really made me want to go into the Fine Arts and Communications field.

After that we went to my Aunt AnnMarie's house to eat lunch. Then we headed-off to Eugene, Oregon (Or-i-gehn) for those new-englanders who cannot pronounce it). We stopped in Twin Falls, ID to eat at a great restaurant called Jaker's. Great food and relatively good prices. We stopped somewhere for the night and then continued-on in the morning. We got lost in Hell...well that's what i called it because it was 109
º and i kept passing-out from heat exhaustion. After tacking-on an extra 4 (or more) hours on to our already 15-hour drive, we gor to Eugene. My family went looking for apartments whilst i was reading two more books. I finished and turned in my homework late (yet my teacher still cares about me...odd). Tuesday night (8/19/08) we went to a pizza/arcade place that Siovhan's Branch President owns. We said good-bye there at the parlor before we each drove separate ways (all eyes teared-up) . We arrived in Kaysville, UT (Wednesday night) to stay at my Aunt Kimberly's parents' home. It was wonderful, but we had leave at 11 the next morning. We didn't get back till 2 a.m. Friday morning, and that was FUN! I'm still currently stuck in Pacific Time and school starts on Tuesday.....

I am tired of people taking advantage of me.I'm tired of getting told who i should date, that's my choice. If i don't want, or am not permitted, to date certain people i should not be told
to date them. My happiness is important while I'm , right? If I'm not going to be happy at all certain people, I won't do it. People need to grow up...seriously.
-B

Friday, July 18, 2008

Of Young Men and Missionaries

Okay, so it's been almost a month since the last post. I think it's time for an update.

I have been called to be the Quorum Mission Leader for my ward's Priest Quorum. With this title comes a lot of work and responsibility. Every week I have to ensure that each boy in my quorum has the opportunity to serve a minimum of six hours with the Elders serving in our ward. Also, mainly because I tend to be the most organized of my quorum, the Bishop asks me to help plan a variety of things.

The boys seem to really not like to do things out of their comfort zones. It is hard to spend 6 hours with 2 19-21 year-old boys that you don't even know, yet the boys in my quorum are not even trying to make an effort to go out with the Elders. Most of them just make excuses and chicken-out the last minute so then I have to call the Elders to tell them that the boy just canceled on me and there isn't another boy to go with them. That makes me angry, I don't want to be the one to tell the Elders that another boy didn't follow through, maybe I'll just have the boys call the Elders and tell them themselves.

Anywho, I have a great time whenever I go out with the Elders. Over the past month I have probably gone out a total of 31 hours. It would be closer to 45 or 50 if my family didn't get upset when I have the car for hours on end! Although it may be a lot of work, this calling is fun. The Elders that come to our ward (no matter where they were before) are always funny, fun to be around, and very spiritual. It never ceases to surprise me that whenever I'm with them, I feel the Spirit in abundance. I now just want to go on mission right now, although it's not possible. I love going out with the missionaries because I feel the Spirit so strongly when I'm with them. But alas, I have 2 more years left to wait!!!

I went to Youth Conference on the 10-12 of this month. It was so much fun! There were definitely some low-lights to the trip but the good outweighed the bad in this situation. The first night was bad, I was only able to get 4.5 hours of sleep and that, in the words of my sister, was no bueno. Then I attempted to sleep on the bus, but obnoxious s sitting behind me would not stop talking and laughing for 10 minutes so that I could fall asleep. The Pageant was great, but nothing has changed in like 3 years so it was the same. The night of the 11th the stake youth went to Keuka College (a tiny, dingy, weird college in Boringsville upstate New York). I got about 5.5 hours of sleep that night and had fun climbing on the roof of the dorms where I was staying (and sneaking over at 6:30 am to awaken my brother and scare the snot out of him). Then we went to the Sacred Grove. It was a lot of fun, except for an annoying from my ward who kept telling people that we are not supposed to talk (at ALL!!!) because the place was so sacred we shouldn't even whisper. Gosh, some people's children! After the testimony meeting, we loaded-up on the buses and started going home. I wasn't able to get very much sleep for 2 reasons: 1. Every time I would fall asleep, someone would kick something around me and I would wake up, and 2. I am on the SYC (Stake Youth Council) and the old SYC members wouldn't do anything that the leaders would want them to do, instead they would tell the leaders that we (the new SYC) needed to take charge and do what they wanted. So what did that mean with 4 other new SYC members on the bus??? It meant that I did all the work! Sure, it wasn't a lot, but it didn't help that any time I would try to get the group's attention, the last ones to stop talking were those very people.

That's been my life for the pat month! It really isn't as boring as it sounds. I just can't wait till I go out to Utah (and Vegas!) to see my sister! Also, school starts in just over a month, that is weird. Senior Year, the final frontier (of high school that is).

Friday, June 20, 2008

Too Fast

So a month has flown by since I last posted. Wow, time seems to really fly by. I will do a recap of my past month so bear with me.
After my last post, I started going to practices for a select band that plays for the main Senior events at the school. I had about two weeks of twice-a-week practice and then we had to play at the never-ending Senior Awards night. The program was in total approximately 2 hours long! Just for awards and scholarships that only a handful of people really got, mainly the Valedictorian).
Then there was graduation. Graduation was June 1st, and it was wonderful. The speeches were not all clichéd and full of nostalgia like the past four years worth of speeches, but they were filled with hope and energy. Hope and energy about the future. The graduating class didn't (and i doubt they do now) know what the future really has in store for them. The ceremony was outside this year, the first year in six (as stated by Mr. Brucato).
I had finals. Well that's just it, I had two. One in my Spanish 5 class, and one in my Anatomy and Physiology class. The other days were either days where I didn't have to come into school, half days, of days filled with study classes (to prepare for the "difficult" finals.
It is now summer. I have been called to be the "Quorum Mission Leader" and part of the Priest Quorum Presidency. I am in charge of the helping the Priests in the ward to get out and help do missionary work. I am on-call with the missionaries, seeing as I have no job, and I go whenever they need me. I have only been called once with week, but I hope that I will be called more often (it's actually rather fun).
I am getting my Duty to God Award in sacrament meeting on Sunday and am giving a talk about my experience in the program as a result. I have been waiting to actually receive the award for about two or three weeks now and I am happy that I don't have to wait any longer. I am going to wait to receive my Eagle award (I am an Eagle scout, but I have not had the ceremony yet) until the end of summer so that my family can come and see me get the award.
That is the best recap that I can do right now, it's late and have a lot of stuff to do tomorrow. -B

Friday, May 16, 2008

Two Weeks

These past two weeks have been so chaotic. I have felt trapped in constant and tremendous drama and chaos. Trapped between comfort and fun. Tossed between groups of friends like a ship in stormy waters. It will all be worth the waiting and pseudo-patience that I try to exert. And mom, I do try to be patient, but a LOT of my patience goes to my school day, so I will try harder. Especially now that seminary's almost over, for now I can get more sleep!
I had my real SAT test on the 3rd, and that was rather easy. I'm supposed to be able to check my scores this coming week, then I can see whether I'm in the clear, or thrown back into more standardized test taking. Then, I had some late orchestra practices to go to for the concert on the 8th.
On the 9th and 10th, I went on my first white-water rafting trip in up-state New York. The rapids were class 3's and class 4's. It was so much fun, and not as nerve-racking as I had believed they would be.
I had band after school twice this week, as well as a concert on the 13th. I got my varsity letter for participating in Marching Band for three years. I also got my Tenor pin, and my Clarinet pin.
Yesterday I had another orthodontist appointment. Dr. Gamm, my orthodontist, stopped all of my elastics. Meaning that my mother no longer has to walk around the house and find tiny little broken pieces of rubber wherever she walks. He also said that my teeth look great, excellent is what he said, and that I might get them off before next school year!!! (I will get pictures up soon!)
I have 2 proms coming up really soon. Milford High School's Senior Prom is this coming Friday, and I'm going with one of my friends, AJ Bruce. I'm looking forward to another great Senior Prom (this is #2). I am going to Fall River High's Senior Prom with a gal from the Fall River Branch, Leslie Mello. I'm a little apprehensive for this particular one, for I don't know any of her school friends and do not want to be embarrassing (well, really, how can I be embarrassing?).