Braden's Busyness

2010-10-13T09:55:00.000-04:00

Mi Gente!

Date: September 27, 2010
Area: Puerto Cabezas, Nicaragua

Okay!

This week we had activities planned for every single day (takes some time away from the work, but animates the people so well). SO the events were going very well for us until Thursday, when the STORM hit. Hahaha. It was actually rather pathetic. We slept in the church, made an emergency plan (thanks to my Eagle Scout power) and ate basically nothing. But the storm was whimpier than a Nor'Easter! I was so surprised. Anyway, after it passed, we went back to the house and dropped everything off and then I headed back out to work with my companion.

Saturday we baptized two little girls and then on Sunday we baptized a couple. All-in-all a great weekend for baptisms in my area!

I love getting emails from you all, especially when Sunday night rolls around and I think to myself, "I really want emails tomorrow...". Yeah, pathetic but true.

This week I really thought about converts and baptisms here in this area of the world. The people here know and understand what we teach them, even if just in a general sense, and then I realized something amazing after our baptisms were all done and over with on Sunday afternoon. The blessing and curse here is that the conversion begins at baptism. The people have to keep going to church and praying otherwise they don't grasp the gospel, they start to falter and then just stop coming altogether. I assumed in the States that when there was a baptism it was amazing and the people basically had testimonies before they got baptized, and over the past 15 weeks I've been repenting of that thought. ;)

The Lord has a lot in store for these humble, amazing people and I just hope that in the future I can be part of it. I love these people here so much it's hard for me to explain how much I care for them, worry about them and just desire them to have everything and become better than myself (my [companion] included!). I am so grateful for all of the opportunities that I have been given in my life to learn and to grow and prepare for this mission service, and I am SO grateful now that I have to opportunities to serve and use the talents I've been given and be able to develop myself more to become a good dad, husband and life-long servant of the Lord.

I love you all. Stay strong and keep the faith. Do whatever it is you need to do to have the Spirit with you at all times. Also, live life to the fullest...don't waste your time on foolish whims and desires.

Love, Elder Braden D. Bolton

2010-10-13T09:54:00.002-04:00

The Service

Date: September 14, 2010
Area: Puerto Cabezas, Nicaragua

Wow, another week gone by in my mish. The weeks seem to just fly right on by me and off into the non-existent nica sunset. :( Jk. I love my time out here in Puerto! It is fantastic! This week is going to be tough though because we're going to [fly to] Managua because Elder Clarke from the Quorum of the 70 is coming and apparently he wants to ask us what is going on with the area. I'm kinda nervous because our Mission President is not happy with us...so this week is going to be very interesting (especially if he takes us all out of Puerto and does E-Changes).

Anyway, I continue working hard. Trying to learn Miskito--a little at a time but still progressing--as well as trying to be a good [trainer] and a good missionary. The Lord has blessed me with a lot of responsibility and I'm just now getting into the habit of everything, which means that a change might be coming... Although I do enjoy having the ability to be the main Elder speaking while we're teaching, etc. Sometimes it seems so stressful having to do a lot of the things by myself, regarding the language, but it's a work in progress.

We just finished organizing all of the important auxiliaries in the branch this week, as well as counted the real CIMI (recent convert list) and divided it from some of the other units. We've also planned some great activities for the branch over the rest of the month. We should be seeing a lot success in regards to our church membership this month.

I still cannot get over how many lessons the Lord is teaching me day by day, week by week here in the mish. I honestly wonder how many I will remember and how many I'll forget; if I should [write] them in a book or just hope not to forget them, I know not what I need to do.

Well, I love you all and hope that all is well wherever this email finds you. Stay in touch with the Lord and with me and we'll all see each other sooner than we can imagine!

Love,
-Elder Braden D. Bolton

2010-09-07T08:17:00.001-04:00

So...NOTICIAS DE ELDER BOLTON e HIJO!

This week we had planned on baptizing two families and getting some really strong potential priesthood holders into the church, yet we had some problems Saturday night and I had to fight to get one baptized (and unfortunately in all the mess I forgot my camera in the house!). How sad. Anyway, it was fantastic, as we got a couple married and then they got baptized together and then I bought a cake and we had a little party with the members. It was quite the event.

Last week our mission president came and spoke very frankly to all of us here in the zone, kinda humbled us, and then left. I learned quite a bit in the two hours that we had to talk to him as a zone and individually when we were doing some practice lessons with him. He was rather impressed by my teaching (even though I was SUPER nervous to practice teaching in front of a mission president) and then old me to keep up the good work training. WHEW! Apparently even though I have so much on my little plate and I feel like I really never know what I'm doing, the Lord has been blessing me and guiding me the entire way. That sometimes seems so hard for me, especially being who I am, uptight and a perfectionist...but I have had to change and grow up a little, relax a little. I have truly learned that all we can do sometimes is trust in the Lord and give Him our all and then hope that tomorrow He will help me give even more.

I keep fighting everyday to prove to the Lord that I am learning, growing and changing. Maybe, if He wants me to be a leader here I will be, but until then I'm going to enjoy my simple life.

I cannot even explain how much stuff I am learning and how much I am growing out here. I love my Heavenly Father and thank Him for everything He gives me. I know that He not only loves me, but that he trusts in me and my abilities. With Him I can do anything and overcome everything, so right now I live as if tomorrow were my last day here in Nicaragua and give my all.

Love you all and hope that all is well.

Love,
Elder Braden D. Bolton

2010-09-01T10:13:00.002-04:00

After Transfers

Date: August 23, 2010
Area: Puerto Cabezas, Nicaragua

Well, transfers have come and gone! And...I'm training this change! Weird. It's my 2nd change here in Puerto and I'm a daddy. The Lord has interesting ways of helping us to learn, but at the same time they feel so right. It's hard to explain, but I hope that somehow you might understand me. Sometimes the Lord puts us in positions that surprise us because we cannot understand why we are being asked to do something or how on earth we might be qualified to do such a calling, but the Lord has prepared me and has been preparing me for a long time to do the work that I'm trying to do here. I have been able to see that my whole life has been in preparation for this mission service; not to mention the Lord's hand has been very "visible" in preparing me for this missionary service as well.

The area I'm working in is proving to be challenging right now, but I know that I can handle all the stress that is being thrown at me right now. My families aren't coming to church, my ZL's are getting upset because we aren't baptizing as much as we used to and they're getting flack from the AP's, and my comp must think that I'm the worst dad ever. But I'm still working hard and still trying to do my best and I think that as long as the Lord knows that it's all that matters. The interesting thing is that right now we are being asked to baptize a ton, but we are also asked to retain them, and here the two do NOT come hand in hand, you get one or the other. Maybe eventually the leaders will understand, but for now we'll all take a verbal beating.

The culture here still shocks me sometimes and it also shocks me how much I've become used to it (as my kid is not like I was, everything seems to be so much worse). I love this country and the people here and want to help them so much, so just know that I'm doing my hardest to change their lives.

I hope that my email finds you all happy and well. Know that I love you all, that I love this work, and that I'm working so hard!

Love, Elder Braden Bolton

2010-09-01T10:13:00.001-04:00

Short Note

Date: August 16, 2010
Area: Puerto Cabezas, Nicaragua
Companion: Elder Velásquez

This week has been crazy, and I messed up...this week is transfers. We know that my comp is leaving and that one of my ZL's is out (as well as 2 other elders). I don't have a lot of time to write because I've been helping do stuff around the zone so much, but I do just want to tell you how amazing being a missionary is to me. I love the relationship that I am building with my Father in Heaven, my Saviour and the Holy Ghost. I love the scriptures so much and I love how simple the Book of Mormon explains the doctrine to us. I have loved the time that I have spent with my comp and I look forward to whatever experiences the Lord is ready to throw at me now.

Know that I love you so much and want the best for all of you (and that in time I will answer your emails, hopefully next week). Stay strong and keep the faith.

BTW-it hit 105º here this week. Death.

2010-09-01T10:12:00.002-04:00

Update

Date: August 09, 2010
Area: Puerto Cabezas, Nicaragua
Companion: Elder Velásquez

Regarding the Miskito: This week has been a great trial for me, as I have been trying to learn but Satan keeps making me feel as if I cannot do it (as well as putting obstacles in my way so that it becomes challenging). I have wanted to learn it so badly and feel as if it is very important for me to learn, not just because I might have the opportunity of opening TONS of areas here on the coast if I do learn, but rather I want to learn so that I can help the people understand the gospel of Jesus Christ and become truly converted. Also, who am I to deny these people the right to have prophecies in Alma 29:8 and D&C 90:11? I want to help fulfill that prophecy and help the people, but only if it is the will of the father. Anyway, maybe when I get back I'll be trilingual! ;)

My investigators are so humble and are trying to change their lives, it motivates me to work so much harder. This week my comp and I contacted into a witch. The people here on the Caribbean have strong beliefs regarding witchcraft. It just so happens that a lot of it here is dark, dark stuff. She wants to change her life around, she wants to get baptized; however this is serious stuff and especially serious when a church gets involved. We talked to my mission president about baptizing her, and we can do it so long as she doesn't do it EVER again. I'm stoked because it'll be great when we baptize that family.

Well, my transfers/changes are next week and I'm kinda nervous...my trainer's leaving me and something big is happening in my zone, and apparently it involves me. Buchica. Oh well, whatever happens needs to happen. I've realized lately that in my life I tend to depend so much on my own strength, intelligence, etc. and that now I need to turn everything over to the Lord. Everything seems so much easier when someone helps you, especially someone who knows and understands exactly how you feel. I really think that faith is one of my struggles, for I am a person that acts and wants immediate action as well. In that regard I'm very impatient: I like things to get done when I want them done. The Spirit has been guiding me to do things and say things that I know I never would be able to do/say/know without it, so I have determined that I just need to be more patient, trust in the Lord in all I do, and let the Spirit guide me. Also, when I was reading my Patriarchal Blessing I realized that some of the things that I was told that used to make me nervous only make me feel more comfortable now and make me realize that everything happens for a reason.

Baptisms: We are still struggling with our numbers, but that doesn't bug me as much as how many true converts we have. I believe that we have a number of strong converts that we have baptized, but the mission office requires more. I just need to work harder and give my all. I love having the opportunity to baptize people and enter the waters of baptism with others.

I love to work, I love working hard and I give my all when I set my mind on doing something. Remember that I am a man of my word and that I have given my word to serve these two years. I am so happy when I help the people here, and when they let me help them wash their clothes by hand (mom, I'm gonna be like a machine when I get back).

Love you all!
Elder Braden D. Bolton

2010-09-01T10:12:00.001-04:00

Puerto Cabezas, Nicaragua

Date: August 02, 2010
Area: Puerto Cabezas, Nicaragua
Companion: Elder Velásquez

Well, it sounds like all is well in the Bolton fam and I am glad to report that I am doing well. Finally starting to learn Miskito (apparently the proper way to spell it). It is so much fun, despite being very difficult. Structurally it resembles German, in that the nouns conjugate as vell as the verbs, etc. If I learn this language then they will keep me out here in this area for my whole 2 years, quite possibly. They need Elders who speak Miskito to go and open up new areas, so as soon as I get most of the language down they might start sending me out with one of the other 3 Elders that are learning it (in total those of us who care to study this language are 4).

I am beginning to teach the English classes this week, as well as missionary preparation for the youth. Fun!

My comp has been rather sick this week, so the work has been going rather slowly, but hopefully things will pick up after he starts to heal (he has an ulcer!). I got my clothes when the new mission president came to visit (the APs brought them to me, but left some of the clothes in Managua). As for the packages, I haven't heard anything, but I can ask this week. Oh, and the money...they have made me a card, I think, but for the past little while they have put the money on my comp's card. The money I've been spending from my card (Sov.) has been for things like extra water that I want, some treats that I wanted to buy, etc. I need to take out like 1400 Cords ($70) for some books and a rechargeable batteries...I might do that today...

Well, I love you guys so much. Thanks again for all that you are doing for me, I can truly feel the influence of your prayers in my life.

Love, Elder Braden Bolton

2010-09-01T10:11:00.001-04:00

Puerto Cabezas...Update

Date: July 26, 2010
Area: Puerto Cabezas, Nicaragua
Companion: Elder Velásquez

Mom, isn't the Doctrine and Covenants amazing! I love it, and it is going to be the next book I read, for I have set a goal that I want to read the Standard Works twice through before leaving the mish. Right now I'm reading the Book of Mormon and my goal is to read it and finish on Dad's birthday (my "present" to dad). ;) I am also going to try and read Jesus the Christ twice (first time in English and then in Spanish).

Okay, so this week has been so crazy, and to be honest the past 3 weeks have been too! My comp and I have been working so hard to teach so many people and each week we end up baptizing like one person a week! We have no idea what the drop-off is, nor what it means. And the weirdest thing is that it's happening all over our entire Zone! I think it's because the church is about to build a second chapel and start a stake here. We are encountering so much opposition, so I am trying to fortify myself, but right now I think we just need to work hard and puch through it. I prayed the other day for like 45 mins. (which seemed like FOREVER) about what I need to do, and the answer surprised me. I never really expected the answer that I received. Basically, I need to just do my best to figure out what the heck is happening here and why Satan appears to be stealing all of the souls we are trying to save.

I am so glad that you are enjoying your personal study of the scriptures so much! I wish I had just set aside an hour or two every day when I was at BYU. I did like a 1/2 hr. constantly, but I should have done more.

I just love this mission so much. I am so glad that I have the opportunity to serve my Saviour and to preach the gospel to souls that are yearning for it. I love this church and all it does for the people that follow those who lead and guide it, that is Jesus the Christ and our prophet, Thomas S. Monson. I am so excited for more trials and more opposition to come so that I can prove to my Savior that I am willing to fight hard for the souls of those that I desire to save.

Be strong and keep the faith.
Love, Elder Braden Bolton

2010-09-01T10:10:00.000-04:00

Short note

Date: July 19, 2010
Area: Puerto Cabezas, Nicaragua
Companion: Elder Velásquez

I FINALLY found a cord for my camera. I'll load some pics right now. My house right now is on a cliff over-looking the ocean!

I have lost weight! Yet the Latins seem to mock me daily for being a "gordito" and sometimes it bugs me, but I know how much I've lost. The tortoises are for food!!! You would love tortoise! It is so much richer than other seafood and tastes like sirloin steak! (Editor's note: See the link on the right side of the page for the recent pictures.) I love you so much and I love the letters that you send me! The information is great, exactly what I want! Right now I need to leave, but I will email you a great email next week and add some photos!!!

Just know that I am well, I am working soooo hard this week and that I love this church.

P.S. Go to Mormon.org and make a Mormon Profile for the Church! Support them in this effort. I am going to do it next week.

Love,
Elder Braden Bolton

2010-09-01T10:08:00.000-04:00

The Work and the Glory

Date: July 12, 2010
Area: Puerto Cabezas, Nicaragua
Companion: Elder Velásquez

July 12, 2010

So, this week has been great! I am still struggling with learning Misquito, but I have the help of my Father in Heaven so I know that I will be able to learn rather quickly. The information that you sent me is very interesting, especially because I didn't know that the languages were so similar (Sumo, Misquito, etc.). The Sumo people don't really live near us, and their race is interesting: most have clear eyes, or blonde hair and more features similar to Asian cultures. The Misquito people are very dark and characteristically Caribbean.

So I would also like to bug y'all about getting me a new, cheap watch as someone stole mine. The old house I lived in was in a very dangerous part of the city, and someone broke in and stole my watch and clothes from some of the other missionaries. So if y'all could help me out a little I would be very happy. I'm sorry I keep asking for so many things, but I can't go out and buy and some of the things out here. And when you do send boxes, put Bible references like crazy and photos of Christ all over it too.

In your next email could you send me some family photos? I regret not printing out photos before I left, but as long as they are on the internet I can always access them and nothing can happen to them! ;)

So my baptisms have been fantastic. I've baptized three people: two have been amazing and one has been, well nothing special. The two women I have baptized have been amazing, super ready for the gospel in their lives. Whereas the man I baptized I think only got baptized because he thought I was cool. He lives in Honduras for part of the year and the rest here in Puerto, but he never knows when he's going to come back.

Some of the amazing baptismal experiences that I've had have been at the baptisms of other missionaries. We now have 12 missionaries in Puerto! I go to some of the baptisms, and when I do I generally talk about the Restoration and the Plan of Salvation. I also get to bear my testimony a lot. Apparently the people love it when I preach out here, so they ask me to talk because they can tell that I love what I'm teaching and know that I believe what I'm teaching as well.

The people I teach are generally amazing. Some of them are so ready for the gospel it amazes me. For example, Saturday night we went to go visit one of our investigators, and we walked in and she said, "So can I get baptized tomorrow instead of next week? Is that okay? I just really feel like I need to take this step." And yesterday we went to go visit a family of like 4 that I had contacted into the other day when I was doing changes, and when we got to the house there were 14 people (9 possible baptisms) and they were basically asking how they could become members of the church because they've heard a little bit about us, want to visit and possibly join the church. I love these experiences, I am only wary of what might become of the people. We try to help them get testimonies of the things we teach and have real experiences with the Holy Ghost. That is where we need to be creative.

I had a revelation the other day on how to get more investigators for our zone too! I'm going to teach English at the chapel once a week, with gospel-themed messages (the lessons) and members are invited, but they need to bring a non-member (or a family). People are stoked because English lessons here are super expensive and many cannot afford to pay for them. This can also help us to bring in SO many new investigators.

I am so excited about all the work out here, sure it's hard, but I know that my Heavenly Father has been preparing me a very long time for service like this, and I know that it will benefit my life and the life of my family now and my family to come so much.

Out here, the main thing we teach is the Restoration. The people here all "believe" in the bible, so we have to lay the Book of Mormon down hard on them. We also have to explain to them what prophets are and how we can pray and receive revelation. They don't always get it, so we have to be very exact and concise in how we explain it. Also, the people here are poorly educated, that is, the older people are poorly educated so we have to teach as if they were primary-aged children. It helps me a lot because it helps me keep everything simple and pure, and I love that. Right now I just have to memorize the scripture references. A lot of the elders here mark their scriptures as if they were some kind of weapon...and I don't really like that, I like to keep mine simple and clean not cluttered with post-its and such. So it's going to take me a little while longer to memorize some of the key references, but oh well, the Lord will bless me with the mental capacity to that which I desire.

Prayer is amazing and I am so happy that you are working on communicating with our Heavenly Father, now we all just have to remember to read our scriptures, as He communicates with us a LOT by means of the scriptures.

Thanks for the scriptures and for the Hymns, they will help me so much to remember you in little ways that doesn't distract me from the work.

I love you all so much, and thank y'all for all the prayers that you have offered in my behalf.

Kliwol Prawbia (Hasta Ver) 'Till We Meet Again

2010-09-01T10:06:00.000-04:00

Found luggage

Date: July 05, 2010
Area: Puerto Cabezas, Nicaragua
Companion: Elder Velásquez

So another missionary had all of my stuff. They found my suitcase in their house when they were moving stuff around. It had my boots, ties, every single letter/envelope I got while in the MTC...my extra diaries, etc. SOOOOO much stuff and I had been praying for a while that I could get it soon, but I know that God was teaching me patience. As you all know, patience is one of my weak spots, so this has been a good experience for me: I had to learn that sometimes I cannot do anything besides pray, have faith and hope that all will turn out well. And that's exactly what I did, I prayed that I could learn the lessons that I needed to learn and that I could just turn my life over into His hands.

I wrote up a list of things that I wanted to tell you, so brace for impact (and I'll get to your new questions soon). HERE WE GO!

Okay, the way people pray out here is so interesting. I'm one of the only people that cross my arms and bow my head, etc. The people here pray with their hands in their pockets, hands over their faces, hands on their head and so on. Oh, and there's an elder in the zone who puts his hand over his food (they hover over his food) when people pray to bless the food. Very interesting. However, I love what they say when they pray: they are very sincere, open and honest. I almost cried when we were visiting a youth the other night. We had gone to visit him to ask him why he hadn't been at church for a little, and he talked to us for a little. Then my companion and I spoke to him about how he can change and I bore my testimony about changing lives, about becoming who we need to be and leaving our past behind us. At the end of the meeting, he prayed that he could change and make take the steps necessary to change. It was beautiful, and very powerful.

They say it's Winter here. Weird! It's like a constant 90ºF and at night it gets to be about 80º. Ugh. Sometimes I just want to die because I sweat so much! But I keep working, thinking about all the weight I'm losing. And, we don't do daylight savings, so I'm on Mountain Standard Time right now.

Okay, I live near an area called Las Colinas (behind a school called Marvin Mitchel). It's a dangerous area, but we're being protected. I will take lots of photos, and when I can, as I am in a technologically retarded area, I will send some to you. I'm sorry, but there's not a lot that I can do in that regard. You might even have to wait a couple months...unfortunately. (I forgot my camera cord at home...and for that reason I might have trouble uploading them and might just have to send the card via mail).

The Culture Shock. Yes, I did have a bit of culture shock at the beginning. People throw trash on the streets, they spit EVERYWHERE and they whistle to get your attention. To me, all of those things are gross or rude, but I'm learning to ignore them and just stay in my own little bubble still. And, I almost forgot, they don't flush toilet paper, they throw it in a trash can next to the toilet. WIERD! And they love fat people. A lot of the people here are overweight, so being chunky is kind of accepted. Nice.

I love the food. Then again, I've always loved rice, and I've learned to love beans over the years. They have a plant called yucca that's like a potato, but it has no natural flavor. Completely bland. The water is nasty. I'm allergic to it because of all the parasites. I've gotten sick a couple of times because of the food, but for some reason the water doesn't affect me as much as the food. Mom, we have someone who cooks for us. She cooks shrimp and seafood all the time and I love it! We also have someone to do our laundry for us, it's rather lovely.

Being sick here, in general, is awful. However, the drugs here are so cheap. You can buy amoxicillin, 6 days worth, for $1.10. Cheap. But the colds here are awful. The diarrhea is mean, and relentless. TMI, but at the same time you wanted to know. ;)

Another interesting thing that I've noticed is that the Lat-Ams don't waste money, they're very frugal and smart with they're money, whereas the Americans in my zone practically throw their money away. I'm being very careful with the money I get; however, I have been using money from my account because the APs didn't make me a credit card so I've had to wait to get money from my comp's card...I still have quite a bit left in my account, I'm just letting y'all know that I've been using my money.

Regarding how we're working: Mom, I think that your friend was right because my companion doesn't realize that he just misses the appointments, he just plans and then we go and do other things. We still teach a lot, but we do miss other opportunities, it's like picking between good and good, how do you choose between two equally good opportunities? He means well, and he is a hard worker, it's just different for me, as I've been raised to make plans and then follow through with them all, not just change them as the day goes along. We've actually offended some people out here because we haven't been in certain places at certain times.

Thanks for the quotes that you sent me. I love them! And that stuff about the Holy Ghost is so true! Some of the most important things that I have learned have come to me while I've been traveling around my area contemplating things. I've come to learn some truly amazing things, and I will share some with you at another time, for I don't have much time left to write to you.

I really think that you would love to visit here. It is hot, but not as hot as it is during the summer here. Maybe you could come and pick me up, we could just stay in one of the hotels with air conditioning!

I forgot to tell you that I had my first baptism yesterday! It was amazing and I was able to confer the Holy Ghost on her too! All in Spanish!

We have like 8 baptisms set us for this week and hopefully 10 for the week after.

--
Love,
Elder Bolton

2010-09-01T10:05:00.000-04:00

Update...Puerto Cabezas

Date: June 28, 2010
Area: Puerto Cabezas, Nicaragua
Companion: Elder Velásquez

28 June 2010

Okay, I am doing SO much better than I was last week. I talked to a few of the missionaries that I'm serving with for advice, and thanks to them I have been doing so much better out here.

Puerto is totally different from all of the other Zones in my mission. For one, everyone speaks Miskito! It's crazy. I am learning little by little, and this week I'm going to acquire a Bible in Miskito and a dictionary. The people here have noticed that I love learning the language and I have had a few people ask me to study well so that I can translate the Book of Mormon into Miskito. The people here can speak Spanish, but that's about it. They can speak it and nothing more; it's very hard for them to understand scriptures and deep conversations. I have been praying that the language will come quickly, as I really do not know how long I will be here.

We get out new president in 2 days! Ah!!! Crazy! I love our current/soon-to-be-gone president. He has seriously helped me so much in like 2 weeks. A couple things that he has told me that have really struck me as important in this life are:

1. The Scriptures. We need to read the scriptures as families, then as couples/spouses, then individually.

2. Trials. We all go through trials, but we have all been given people to help us: companions. We need to go through a weekly "companionship inventory" with our families and our spouses. We need help fixing our problems, and who better to help us than those whom we love?

Okay, full story. After transfers I went out to get my bags and one was gone! So as of right now I have like 4 short-sleeved shirts, three pairs of pants, 3 pairs of socks and a number of garments (almost all have been purchased by the mission for me). Someone took my bag on accident, and they have it in their house. This doesn't happen a lot, but it's awful when it does because one is left without clothes for 6-18 weeks! Then, when I got to Puerto I found out that the Branch I'm serving in is solely a Miskito-speaking branch. Wierd. Then, when we were heading back to Managua, I found out that we were going to fit 13 people in one Toyota truck. We were all crammed in there for soooooo long. I lasted 13 hours in the bed of the truck, then spent 2 hours inside. My back was completely bruised and I couldn't sleep well for almost 5 days. Painful, but soooooo much fun. The Hunger Strike that we encountered was totally savage: everyone there had weapons and machetes and were not very kind. But we got through. It was a miracle. Many people here in Puerto have been telling me that they fear the war is starting again. Sure, there's always the fear that the war will commence again, but the people here feel as if it is imminent. This saddens me, for I just want to help the people here and how can I do that if I'm in some other country?

We got back to Puerto Friday afternoon (after being in Managua for 4 1/2 days!) and went back to work. I've been working so hard so that every night when I pray and report back to my Heavenly Father I can tell Him that I worked my hardest. I have been trying so hard to be a great missionary, but to be honest it's hard to be fantastic when you have others holding you back. I mean, we plan and plan and plan but then we end up not doing what we planned at all and sometimes it feels like we're wasting time. I'm sure things will get better over time.

Letter--I will only get dearelders when I go back to Managua or when someone from Managua comes to visit our zone, so if you all want to keep writing, go ahead, they'll sit there in the office for a little bit longer, but I can enjoy them later.

New address:

Oficina Discover
Oficina 2D
Apartado Postal 3600
Managua, Nicaragua

Okay everyone, time is up for me. I love all of you so much and cannot explain to you the love that I can feel from you. It is amazing how much help I have received from your prayers, the scriptures, my prayers and my Patriarchal Blessing. Remember to read your scriptures and pray like I said, family, couple and individually as well as read your patriarchal blessing. I shall await more emails!

-- Love,Elder Bolton

2010-09-01T10:01:00.000-04:00

Letters from Puerto Cabezas

Date: June 22, 2010
Area: Puerto Cabezas, Nicaragua
Companion: Elder Velásquez

There is so much to tell you and I seem to be so limited in
words at this point, but I will try and explain to you how my first week as
been as well as I can.

So on the plane ride I spoke to a woman and bore my testimony about eternal
families, as her father had died that morning so she was flying from Miami to Managua
to cremate him and scatter his ashes. Weird, but it was a great experience.

I got into the airport and had to go through customs then have my bag hand
checked by the Nicaraguan government and then I could go out and meet my
Mission President and his wife. It is hot in Managua. Dad, maybe it's a good
thing that you guys aren't coming out here, you would die. It gets to be like
95 by like noon or 2 o'clock and only cools down when it rains (basically). So
we got picked up at the airport and then went to McDonalds to get dinner. After
that we went to one of the 2 mission homes, the South Home, and got ready for
bed. It took me forever to fall asleep; I mean it was 85 degrees after all.

Tuesday we had some training and some orientation stuff to do, I had a 5 second
interview with my mission president (and I mean literally 5 seconds). Then we
went out tracting with one of the Managua Zones--there are 4 Zones in Managua.
After that we went back to the mission home and ate dinner and slept.

Wednesday was transfers. I am in the Nicaragua Managua North Mission! My
trainer is Elder Velásquez, from Quetzaltenango, Guatemala. I'm serving in the
highest baptizing area in the church right now, it’s called Puerto Cabezas.
Last month they baptized over 100 people and like 12 families! Crazy! It's a
lot colder than Managua, by like 5 degrees and it rains a lot more. Oh, and
it's a 24-hour bus ride from Managua to Puerto, that was tough. The people here
are fantastic. Such hard workers, they make me feel like I was such a lazy
member before the mission. They go out every Sunday and make sure that the
recent converts are all coming to church and that a lot of the less active
families are coming.

I love my mission president. He is so frank and blunt and says everything as it
is. It's fantastic.

Um, so lots of random things have happened to me, but I don't want you to every
worry about how I am doing. No matter what trials we have in this life we can
overcome them with our faith and determination. My APs have told me that I
might quite possibly have had the most difficult first week of any missionary
they have ever met, but I know without a doubt that I am being blessed with
trials; they strengthen me, humble me and draw me closer to the Savior.

One of the coolest things that has happened to me happened just last night. We
were driving back to Managua (seriously a 16 hour journey by car) so that we
can see the president and say goodbye to him at his departure devotional and
there was a strike going on. A hunger strike against the government. They were
turning ambulances away! But we got through. We prayed together, we sang hymns
in Spanish together and some people went out and talked to the people while
others guarded the truck, for in Nicaragua you always need to watch your stuff,
everywhere you go whatever you're doing. But I was praying fervently with
Heavenly Father when I remembered a line from my Patriarchal Blessing that
states basically any righteous desire of your heart shall be granted, so long
as it is needful (paraphrase). So I basically said to my Father in Heaven,
"I really want to go to Managua and need to see the President one more
time. This is not just something I want, but my whole Zone hasn't been to Managua
and won't be able to see those in the South Mission if they don't see them now.
Please help us to get across." And eventually, after a while the people
softened and let us pass, but I was praying and I did not doubt in the power
the Lord has given us as missionaries.

Remember this lesson, prayer is the only way we can be close to our Father in
Heaven. It is the only way we can keep our relationship strong with him.

Family, I love you so much and I miss you terribly. If you can all pray not
just as a family, but personally as well that I might be buoyed up during these
trying 2 years I will be eternally grateful.

Mom, I will try and get more info to you guys about how to get letters to me
and stuff. I just need the new address. So if you could like send a little
Facebook note to Heather Thomas and ask her to tell other not to send stuff to
the old address and tell them that they can still send stuff through pouch to
the NORTH mission, that'd be great, that'd be fantastic, just let them know that they need to send mail via pouch to my new mission.

I love you all so much, and I think about you all the time. It brings me such
great happiness to know that we are such a beautiful family. Please, do not
worry about me, pray for me and the people of Nicaragua.

--

Love,

Elder Bolton

P/S

Really, do not worry about me, simply pray that I can be
effective and not get too homesick

Also, they have officially extended my mission 3 weeks, so technically I get to
serve out my whole mission in Nicaragua.

--

Love,

Elder Bolton

2010-09-01T10:00:00.000-04:00

Letters from the MTC

Date: June 08, 2010
Area: MTC

Life is great here in the MTC. I have had some amazing experiences the past week that I want to recap really quickly for you (having only 30 minutes to write really makes me nervous...).

1. Teaching. I love teaching. My companion and I have become rather good at teaching with each other and teaching with the spirit. Our teacher told us that we still have some things to working on, but that if we work hard the rest of the district will follow us (apparently we're like the leaders at teaching, pretty cool).

2. THE SPIRIT. I have had such a spiritual week. I've had a lot of interesting experiences in my life that have led me to need to rely on the spirit to live, and for that I am so grateful. I have been able to use that to my advantage to help teach and to have scriptures come to my mind or have simple phrases of power be at the ready when I need to help an "investigator" learn something, or know that I have a testimony of it. I have also been able to receive so much personal revelation about my life.

3. Music. So, it's kind of sad that we are not allowed to listen to our own music here at the good old MTC, but it has helped me to rely on singing hymns and the music of the heart. We also had some of the old Church Hymnal Committee members come and talk to us about singing and brining our lives in line with Christ's (the speakers included the people who wrote the music for Press Forward Saints, Our Savior’s Love and Thy Holy Word). AMAZING. I shook all of their hands and thanked them for the work that they had done for the church and then thanked them, being the music enthusiast that I am, for having brought that music into my life. I told one of them that I had been in choir since I was 9 and he said it was a shame that the MTC Choir isn't running right now. So true.

4. Classes. The cool thing about being in the advanced class is that I have the opportunity to simply be taught in Spanish, rather than having to learn Spanish half the time and learn how to teach the other half. Yesterday we had a substitute teacher, as one of teachers was taking his LSAT (yikes!). He was amazing and really helped me feel comfortable. He asked us if we felt like we had received too much information yet. I said "Um. YES! I feel like I'm being inundated." (Forgive the rough English, I’m trying to remember what we were saying and then trying to translate everything into English...) He then told us that the MTC is like a fire hydrant, the hose carries the information to us, and then we have the hose put in our mouths...and VOILA! Our heads are getting blasted with information that we don't know how to use yet. But then he testified that when we get into the field so much of it will make sense, obviously not all at once, for that is too easy; however, over time we will remember what we have learned here and it will help us out.

My district is fantastic. After a few weird incidents--an Elder joining us for his last week being here after being here for 14 weeks, and one of our Sisters going home--I have realized that my life is now truly in the Lord's hands and that I need to get used to having my life just tossed about like a ship on the seas.

Mom, the Doctrine and Covenants are amazing! They give us so much guidance for these times, as well as give us hope for the life to come. I love that quote that you sent me from President Hinckley, it was exactly what I needed to hear about the doctrine contained in that precious book. And THANK YOU for using Preach My Gospel. In reality the whole ward should use it, but they don't understand that it's not solely for the missionaries or missionary work. Everything in there is amazing and can help us so much in our everyday lives: whether it is studying, teaching with the spirit, or even listening and teaching skills, every chapter in that book is meant for the betterment of our lives.

I see Ellis, Elder Hunsaker, daily. He's in my ZONE! I was so excited. It was such a wonderful tender mercy.

I have gotten all of your letters and I'm so excited that you have all gotten mine! I will write a few more before I leave on MONDAY! WOHOOO! Okay, itinerary, because I know I need to send it: I leave SLC at 6 in the morning on Monday June 14th. I arrive at Dallas at 9:35 and then have a 3 hour lay-over. Then I head to Miami and land at 4:35 and then stay there for my 2 hour layover. Anyway I leave Miami at 6:50 and arrive at Managua at 7:30. Flight #'s: American Airlines 1868, 795, 986.

I buzzed my hair, 1/2" all around. Weird. The girl cutting my hair asked me how long it had been since I had it that length, I told her I was 10 or 11 the last time it was that short.

Well, my time is almost up. I love you all! Keep studying your scriptures and praying for me!
--
Love,
Elder Bolton

2010-09-01T09:53:00.002-04:00

Letters from the MTC

Date: June 01, 2010
Area: MTC

Okay, brace for impact! I'm going to unload everything you want to know in the 17 mins I have left thanks to the BYU/MTC IT department. (They were very rude today...silly people).

I am in a district with 4 other Elders and 3 Sisters (Hermanas). We're the only district in the Zone with Hermanas right now, but we get two whole districts of them this Wednesday. I live with one other Elder, my companion Elder Flores from California. We have an entire room to ourselves, so I get to have two pillows all to myself.

Schedule (the basic low-down):

6:30-Get Up and prepare for the day.

7:00-Be to class for personal study

7:30-Breakfast

8:15ish-Class or Gym Time (gym is about an hour)

12:30-Lunch

1:15-Class (or Study Time)

5:30-Dinner

6:15 Class (or Study Time)

9:00 Plan

9:30 Bedroom

10:15 Quiet Time

10:30 in BED

We have devotionals and firesides and stuff intermittently spread all over our very chaotic schedule. But the worst of it is over! I have now been here for almost a week exactly and I am supposed to leave the 16th of June! Side note: I had to go give some blood today because Nicaragua requires a blood check to see iv we have HIV or AIDS. The nurse said that they were just doing it as a precautionary measure, as they had already told Nicaragua that I was clean and they had checked my blood. ;)

Mom, that experience that you had at the Oquirrh Mountain Temple reminds me of my life at BYU. Every day I would walk out of my building when I was heading out to class or work I would see the temple as I was leaving my building. It is so amazing how many blessings we can experience for literally (or figuratively) facing our "tents" to the temple. And that temple is absolutely gorgeous! All I remember is seeing the chandelier when we were at the dedication last august (which feels like yesterday, by the way). And you have the worst luck when you travel. After reading your letter I feel the need to emphasize that life is interesting when you travel...

Your letters and thoughts/prayers help me out so much here; I can definitely feel your influence in my life as you are all trying to help me.

I love you all so much and cannot wait to send you letters and photos (as I really do not have much time to email every day).

Look up D&C 49 (about the Second Coming) and when you read verse 24 think of me!

keep praying for me! Love,
Elder Bolton

(The rest of this is from a brief one page letter we received from him in the mail, the same day as his email.)

Dear Familia,

I just wanted to let you all know that I'm doing well! Today was chaotic and so busy.

I love you all so very much! Everything here is what I expected and more!

My companion is very kind and very patient with me. There are all native Latinos in my class and the Spanish that they speak is VERY different from the Spanish that I speak. I love them all so much and I love my Branch President and teachers so much.

Love you lots. Stay strong.

Stories:
1. I saw who my companion was, and I knew him! I met him randomly at school and we connected real well. At first I was nervous because I didn't know him extremely well, but I love him. He is a fantastic Elder and now, District Leader (even though I am Senior Companion).

2. I got into class on Wednesday and was super nervous. Dad, I was not ready for the advanced program then, but I am now. I think in Spanish and I practice it all the time. I get to have fun with it a lot because I with all natives!

3. I told my Branch President that I felt inadequate in that classroom, but he told me that he knew that I was fulfilling prophecy. Check out D&C 49:24 for more information!

Languages

2010-05-19T14:43:00.001-04:00

I LOVE this website. I just found it, and despite the fact that i will only be able to go on it for like the next few days...you can bet your life that I will be on it. all. the. time.

http://www.transparent.com/wotd/

Confusion

2010-05-06T20:57:00.003-04:00

life is confusing. feelings are constricting. love is baffling.

i look forward to having certain situations alleviated, taken off my burdened shoulders, yet when it happens i feel terribly empty. i was so excited to get away from school, to leave the stress and a lot of the annoying situations behind me so that i could start preparing for my mission.

however, i feel somewhat hollow. i am still doing the good things in my life, praying, reading my scriptures, but i still have this empty spot. it took me a while to understand why it existed, then it dawned on me like the bright sun over the green haze of the New England horizon: i'm missing something that i made and integral part of me. i'm missing the connections that i made at school.

much like trees rooted firmly into the ground i am strengthened by the connections that i make. i will not foster a relationship if i feel it will just wither and die. much like trees i plant my strength deeply and do not expected to be uprooted, to be surprised and then suddenly without feeling. numb. gone.

i am no longer connected to my roommates in the same manner. i am no longer part of the everyday lives of my coworkers. the teachers that i hated at times and yet loved because they challenged me to be better than i am. i miss the great friends i had contact with almost every day, and people that i could talk to about all the craziness that was going on in my life/head. i no longer have the same pull in their lives...

at times i feel like a ghost, one that solidifies and touches someone's heart. then, after time, i slowly fade to let them live the rest of their life while i watch, totally helpless in the background (no other influence permitted). at times i wonder: have i been a good enough example? have i led them to understand their potential? will i ever have someone reach out and pull me back into mortality?

i also want someone to love me. someone here, with me. i yearn to be needed as much as i need others. that is my weakness. that is my kryptonite. love. i like to spend time with people, but it's always hard for me to tell if someone just likes to be around me or if they want to be closer to me. i guess i shouldn't worry about that now that i'm going to be an ambassador for the gospel i live and love. but still, the feeling persists.

Rant

2010-04-07T23:55:00.000-04:00

after last week (and its spill over into this week) I feel like i need to express my feelings.

sometimes my blog seems to be a giant forum for me to RANT.

other times I feel as if people actually read what i write and relate to what I'm trying to communicate.

for whatever reason y0u are reading my blog...thank you...hopefully i'm not the only crazy one out there...although i think i'm not the only crazy in provo...

things that have bugged me over the past couple weeks:

i don't know why it is but i feel as if everything i do make people so react so dumbly. like today, i had JDawgs for lunch and when i eat fatty foods my tummy hurts.was well aware of this side effect. yet i wanted it so badly that i got it anyway. so, in short, i wound up getting hot dog burps and i accidentally burped in my work vehicle and my coworkers made fun of me the entire way...even though my other coworker burped, no joke, seven times after mine. they told me i smelled bad, i apologized and felt bad, but they wouldn't leave me alone.

also, it's totally fine for them to just be lazy and not do deliveries and study in the van when they have quizzes to prepare for, but when i ask to not do a delivery or to not drive they get upset. and they can joke around but when i try to be funny they think i'm weird. they find it weird that i actually PAY ATTENTION TO DETAILS. people don't really understand that they can tell me a story once and i'll remember it pretty well, yet for some reason that makes me weird? sorry, the last time i checked a memory like that was pretty awesome. most people cannot remember things like i can...whatever.

i also don't understand why it is that people are so rude and sarcastic all the time. sarcasm really bugs me, especially when people follow it with the phrase "you know i'm just kidding. don't take things so personally!" that bugs me more than the sarcasm. i don't know if most people understand that sarcasm is truth wrapped up in a seemingly funny package held together with the sticky "SCREW YOU" and "YOUR IMPERFECTION ARE HILARIOUS" tape all over the nicely decorated gift wrap. i know that i'm not perfect, so i don't need your jokes to help me realize quite how imperfect i am, thank you.

i just wish older people would grow up. you may be 22 or 23 or 24, i don't give a fart. you can act a little bit older. there are times to have fun and to act younger; however, as a general rule acting your age won't kill you. i hate that i can act older and slightly more mature than those that are older than myself and for acting in such manner makes me mock worthy.

i also do not like people who cannot keep secrets. secrets are meant to be shared between people who trust one another. if there's one important lesson that i've learned at school it's that i can only trust a select few people. i have a mental list. and for some reason men suck at secret keeping...it's just not in their hard wiring...keep that in mind women.

and this wouldn't be complete without a post about my two PSYCHO roommates. i love two of my roommates but i have two that are like legit crazy. one has tried twice to force me to take him to the bus stop on the edge of campus (once he woke me up and i think he learned NEVER to wake me up--well, if you're not my mom it's not a good idea). the other is just like bipolar and for the past week has come home and gone to bed after me, generally waking me up around 3 or 4 a.m., then getting up and leaving around 4 p.m. i wonder why he complains that he's getting bad grades when he doesn't study, he plays video games and stay up until all hours of the early morning. he has also started to use my roommate's shampoo because his "disappeared" (i.e. he used it and doesn't want to replace it).

so, to all you who choose to be rude, overly sarcastic, immature and just dumb, this is me saying that i'm glad to know you. you make me grow. you make me learn. you force me to remind myself that i'm glad that i'm different and that i may be stupid, but that i pale in comparison to your example.

Parts and Pieces

2010-02-09T03:00:00.002-05:00

My mom is soooo right (and it's odd that we've both been thinking about this). I often wonder if I give too much of myself to people, or if I give too much of my heart to things that really don't matter. I wonder if I spread myself too thin trying to accomplish everything I can, being a perfectionist like my momma.

Will I ever be whole again? After Siovhan left for college I felt like part of me was gone, then after leaving for college I felt even more incomplete. Slowly I started feeling better as I became closer to my roommate, but now he's gone too (as well as numerous other friends).

Sometimes I miss being 11 years old. I miss being innocent and young. I miss crushes. I miss not worrying. Everything seemed--and probably was--so much easier then. Love. Hate. Faith. Intelligence. Friendships. Family.

But, I know that everything happens for a reason. I am meant to struggle sometimes so that I can remember help is no more than a prayer away. I find solace in President Hinckley's words:
"I come to you tonight with a plea that we stop seeking out the storms and enjoy more fully the sunlight. I am suggesting that as we go through life we try to "accentuate the positive." I am asking that we look a little deeper for the good, that we still our voices of insult and sarcasm, that we more generously compliment virtue and effort. Now I am not asking that all criticism be silenced. Growth comes of correction. Strength comes of repentance. Wise is the man or woman who can acknowledge mistakes pointed out by others and change his or her course.

What I am suggesting is that you turn from the negativism that so permeates our modern society and look for the remarkable good among those with whom you associate, that we speak of one another’s virtues more than we speak of one another’s faults, that optimism replace pessimism, that our faith exceed our fears. When I was a young man and was prone to speak critically, my wise father would say: 'Cynics do not contribute. Skeptics do not create. Doubters do not achieve.' "

This talk helps remind me to have faith, to trust my Father in Heaven with my life (especially with a mission right around the corner) and to hope for a brighter tomorrow. I need to be a little bit more optimistic than I have been lately...

Catharsis

2010-01-16T05:26:00.004-05:00

I have had a rather cathartic week...work, classes, friendships, etc.
I feel like a mess...a chaotic jumble of human emotions all thrown into one being.

Duality

2009-12-13T04:34:00.005-05:00

Sometimes it's quite interesting the assignments that we're asked to do for some of our classes. Last semester I had to write an essay on the duality of human beings; how sometimes they seem as though they can act one way or believe one set of ideals but at the same time they act another way and have a subset of ideals, an almost secondary set of ideals. I have noticed this a lot more in my life since then. People can say one thing and believe another, act one way and really be quite different. To me, it seems as though these people are living in and "idealistic reality" as my professor stated.

Sometimes it's hard to tell when one person says something and means quite the opposite. It's hard to try and discern when people are being honest and when they're trying not to hurt you or trying to keep the truth from you. I tend to be frank and brutally honest with people, and very rarely do I keep the truth from others (very, very rarely). So I guess it is out of a desire to know that I write this post, as I desire to know the truth (and change the nature of this post because I did start writing it in anger and hostility).

Lately I have had a great personal battle with life. Life gets interesting when we don't have big problems, rather when have LOTS of little ones that all start to bog us down after trying to get rid of them. So, after much prayer and studying(and singing), I have some to the conclusion that this IS life. We just need to learn how to deal with it, and part of how I deal with it is reading the scriptures. Alma 34:40-41 and 2 Nephi 2:1-4 help me a TON. I find my strength and direction in the scriptures and in prayer.

I miss my family, but after my "time of rest" at home I understand that they won't change all too much within the next couple years. I love my family and know that I will have them for eternity, and that brings me much comfort.

I only have mere weeks left until I can turn in my papers...weeks. I remember sitting in my bedroom about a year-and-a-half ago thinking this time would never come. Time has gone by much more quickly than I would have liked it to, yet now it is moving so slowly...maybe it's because i'm anticipating something...

What is this Feeling?

2009-11-11T14:24:00.005-05:00

I have a lot of feelings. Lots. No joke. Sometimes I find it hard to filter through all the muddied emotions and the incoherent thoughts that seem to creep inside my head and into my very core. The nice thing about life is that we are never alone, no matter how alone we may feel and how different we may ink we are there is always at least one person who understand: our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. He never wants us to feel alone, he never wants us to be miserable. In fact, he wants the exact opposite, to be joyful and amiable, and that is why he blesses us with such amazing gifts like the Holy Ghost and true friends.
I am so grateful for the people that the Lord has given me in my life. I have been so blessed to be given great friends and an absolutely amazing family. So, to the people I love and care about, here's a shout-out.

Mom-You are my life. I live because I know that you love me and that you worked so hard to get me here. I live because you were there for me when nobody else was. I love because you taught me how to love. I serve because you always demonstrated true Christianity through your life of service. I am who I am because you eased me through the many problems that I had, you always held me and comforted me when I needed it. I am eternally grateful for your guiding influence in my life.

Dad-You were the example to which I always tried to pattern my life. Your quiet love and service were always astounding to me. You always give selflessly and you live selflessly; that is something I have tried to do in my life. I love how you honor your priesthood and how you always try to bless the lives of others through your actions, your prayers and your love.

Siovhan-You have always inspired me. I want to be like you so much. I have always wanted to be as great of a writer and as creative/inventive with words as you. I look us to you and honor your example of selfless love and charity every day. You are simply amazing.

Ben-You are such an amazing young man. You have such talent! You are creative and artistic, imaginative and inventive, and you have such a skill with words. Another thing that you are great at is forgiving other people. No matter who wronged you, no matter what they may have done you just forgive them. You also love people for who they are, you have this amazing and incredible ability to love others.

Mikaela-I always loved how your treated me with such love and respect. No matter how difficult life was for you you tried to make sure that your older brother was doing well and that I was happy. You make my life so much happier than you can imagine.

More to come...

Altruism

2009-10-26T04:46:00.003-04:00

This week was a tough week. I've slowly, as the weeks progress and the weather changes, been realizing more and more how much I miss my home. I secretly love MA and the trees, the wacky weather, the wackier people, and the hectic driving. I especially miss my family and my ward. Don't get me wrong, I love BYU, my roommates and my ward out here, I simply miss the family ward spirit. I miss my siblings and most especially my parents.

My mom is my best friend and was always there for me when nobody else was. She loves me infinitely and eternally. She always gives me great advice and tries to ease my feelings and my mind. She has been on my mind constantly the past week, especially as I realized that it's been exactly two months since I've seen her or had her hug me and kiss me. I'm coming to realize that the Lord is refining me and training me (and I openly welcome needed training), but it still hurts sometimes not having that compassionate, charitable aura around me when I want it.

Now I need to thank someone that has helped me so much. My roommate. He is one of the nicest and most patient people that I know. He is a genuinely kind spirit, one with a great capacity to love and serve others, and one who always tries to make the best decisions he can. He is very forgiving and is patient with himself and doesn't generally make decisions that he would regret. In that regard I wish I could be more like him. He doesn't care how people view him and he never tries to offend people. So, Kyle, thank you. Thank you for always listening to me and putting up with my crazed emotions, thoughts and feelings. Thank you for helping all the time. You are the best friend/spiritual brother that i always wanted. You understand who I am, you respect me, you care. I cannot explain to you how much it means to me that you are there for me now when many others are not. You are such a strong person and such an inspiration for the type of person, the type of companion, I want to be.

Now it is late and I must retire...off to bed!

-B

Toda Mi Vida y Mi Alma

2009-09-02T01:07:00.002-04:00

Este tiempo es un gran tiempo para mí. Estoy muy feliz porque todos mis sueños se están realizando.
Me encanta todas mis clases son magnificas! Mis profesores son muy amables y graciosos!
Ahora le estraño mi casa y la area que crecí...los árboles, los colores, los olores...argh.
A mi familia, os extraño pero yo sé que este tiempo puede ser muy dificil, pero estoy seguro que podemos sobrevivir este distancia. También pienso que es una buena experencia para nosotros...es una preparación para mi misión

Os amo.

Reflection

2009-06-21T23:56:00.002-04:00

As usual this whole "moving on to my new life" process has been causing me to reflect more. So I have a list: a list of attributes I've acquired and been taught, etc. for which I'm grateful.

Writing/Reading: I have Siovhan to thank for giving me a love of words. When I was younger she would write me notes, and she would put emphasis on certain words in the notes. I loved how powerful words were to her, and I envied how they spoke to her. Thank you Siovhan, for everything you do.

Love/Reading: My mother has blessed me with my openness for compassion and charity. Although I fight it sometimes, I actually care about a great number of people. I have a hard time seeing people suffer. I've learned how deep love goes, as my mother has been with me through some of the toughest times in my life (72 hrs full labor anyone?!). My mom loves to read. She reads really quickly and I'm so jealous. She has always told me that all books contain some form of truth and that they have power and knowledge contained in them. Because of her I love to read. Thank you mom, I love you soo much, and I really hope you know that.

Learning/Languages: My dad inspired me to learn. He has always been brilliant and I have always wanted to know more than he knows! Odd, but true. I envied his brain. But because he has always pushed me and wanted me to excel, I have. He also inspired me to pursue my interest in Spanish. Y, por el, he recibido un gran amor para la idoma espanola y para idiomas en general. Thanks daddy, I love and admire you.

Patience: Even though my parents have desperately tried to instill patience in my personality...I have to thank another party for helping me. His name is Brandon. He was a missionary in my ward, and he taught me to slow down and take life as it comes. He was always open to change and new things happening, and I admired that about him. I'm not always as patient as I should be, but because of his example I am more patient. Thanks Brandon (even though you can't read this tehehe).

Perspective: This one is for the Branch fam. Mama Lisa, you always listen to me, and help me to understand that people think differently. You helped me realize that I am very different from other people (in a good way), and I know now that I just have to give people time and allow them to change in ways they come to realize. Emily has taught me to enjoy life, and be brave, to never give up and love everything! Thanks you two!

Everything else: My parents and my Heavenly Father have helped shape me into the person I am today, so they are to blame! Hahaha. Just kidding. I enjoy the love that come to me from all three, and I enjoy the support and strength they are. Thank you. Gracias por todo, mi vida, mi alma, mi todo.

Me

2009-06-17T23:30:00.002-04:00

Write a letter to our future selves 15 years from now. Give advice, insight, etc.

Dear Braden,

You may not remember this note, but you will...i'm writing just to remind you of a few things.

Don't every be pushy and constantly correcting people. Yo may still do it from time to time, but be polite and kill 'em with love after doing it! Don't be too hard on your kids, they're bound to mess up from time to time, as you did many-a-time as well. Let them learn and grow like your Heavenly Father meant to have them do. Don't try and have them grow up too fast, and let them develop their own interests, hobbies, personalities, and friendships.

Be nice to your wife (mom will kill you if you don't), listen to her thoughts, worries, concerns, feelings. Be respectful and never judgmental. Never dishonor her.

Tolerate people and be patient. Never sell yourself out and pretend to be something you are not. Your friends like you just the way you are (or were :P) and you should never change just so that other people will accept you.

Above all else...love Christ, love your family, love the gospel, love others..love, love, love. Charity, true love, is the key to life.

Sincerely yours,
Braden

My Heart in a Nutshell

2009-06-15T23:53:00.005-04:00

My inspiration--for more than just this post.

Instructions: "with as much creativity as you can muster, show your heart in: a picture, a poem, a song (or piece of music), a phrase (or quote), an item of clothing, a place, and (just for fun) a Disney princess."

Photo:

some of my favorite flowers are dahlia. they are so beautiful...and i love this one because it is so colorful and bright.

Poem:
The Road Not Taken Robert Frost

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth.

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same.

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

so good...sometimes the road that is the best is the one less frequently taken.

Song:
August Moon by Sara Bareilles. I love her, and I love this song.

Quote:
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
-Eleanor Roosevelt
sure, i heard this on princess diaries when i was younger, but it is so inspirational, important and true.

Clothing:
could not live without my hoodie. so serious..i love these things.

Place:

my favorite city in my favorite condition. i love the rain, and i love england.

Disney Princess:

i love, love, love, love aurora. she is beautiful, she can sing, and she is gorgeous when she sleeps! what more can i ask for?

You Oughta Know

2009-06-09T20:24:00.003-04:00

So, after Siovhan had her post based on the prompts given by Twenty Something Writers, I felt inspired to try it.

To my future children,
you oughta know:

1. Be yourself. Never sell yourself out to be something you're not. Never become or try to be what others want to you to be. Never be anything but you. If I had known that I might have been able to be happier through high school.
2. Don't be clingy. Apparently smothering your friends with love and trying to spend lots of time with them does little to help a friendship. Find a balance in your life, and find balance in your friendships.
3. Know your place. I don't mean know your limits, I mean know where you belong, know your strengths. Take time to learn about the gifts that you've been blessed with and learn to hone them. Know that you always have a place in your family and in the Lord's kingdom.
4. Pray, pray, pray. A wise woman once told me that even when I think I've done all that I can, I can always pray to be able to do more. We may not know when out lives are turning around or when our trials are over, but never forget that you have a Father in Heaven who knows you and loves you and is always willing to help you.
5. Read. I regret not reading a lot when I was younger because now it takes me forever to read anything. The more you read in your youth, the more quickly you'll be able to read in the future.

I may be an annoying dad, one that you don't think can understand, but know that I love you and that I'm always here for you.

Peace

Recap

2009-06-08T18:17:00.004-04:00

So a lot happened this past week. I'll do a brief recap for all y'all.

I had my last senior prom last Friday/Saturday and had a blast, but I woke up Monday morning with an illness. It only got worse, and Tuesday I developed a fever. So I had the missionaries and my dad give me a blessing because I felt very, very ill. It was a very beautiful blessing and an elder that meant very much to me gave me a beautiful reminder that my Father in Heaven loves me. Then he was transferred. Sad. But he's learning and growing in another place where he has been called to train a greenie...

Grandma and grandpa flew in on Wednesday and that night was my Senior Awards night. I earned two certificates/awards and three scholarships totaling almost $1000! Then Kirsten flew in on Thursday and that night I was ordained to be an Elder! It was such a great thing, but even better was what came after. Not even a minute after i was ordained my good friend asked me to give him a blessing (as he had a very important test coming up). It was one of the most memorable experiences of my life and I was very happy. Later on was the Senior Night, a weird form of a talent show. it was very nice but just felt weird...being with my class after being away for so long.

I had an open house on Saturday and about 100 or so people showed up in about two hours. Graduation was Sunday afternoon. It was nice, and all of my friend's speeches were wonderful (the class president, valedictorian, and salutatorian are all my friends).

It was a very eventful week and very exciting...but now things are settling down and I need to find things to do.

Que todo vaya bien.

Bad Blogger

2009-05-09T14:08:00.003-04:00

I'm such a bad blogger. I always forget to post (for weeks on end) and then I need to do summaries of everything that's happened. So, I've resolved to make sure I write at least once a week, and I'll motivate myself with chocolate. Mmmmm.

So, the weekend before my Spring Break I had a Band/Choir/Orchestra competition in Annapolis/Baltimore, Maryland. Milford High School Music was awarded 11 awards: 1 gold in band, 1 gold in A Capella Choir (my choir), 1 gold in orchestra, 1 silver in Concert Choir (Ben's choir), the "Best Overall Department", the "Best Overall Instrumental Program", the "Adjudicator's Award", and 3 invitations to a more prestigious competition in NYC, Chicago, and LA, and one other that escapes me. I had a great time, I got to talk about the gospel to a few friends, I made a great life-long friend (a person that I knew but wasn't really friends with), and I relaxed.

Then I came home. I hung out with friends for a couple days over vacation, but then I just sat at home because everyone was busy later on in the week. Then I got an allergic reaction to something, shaved and cut all the hives open, and gave myself a infection. So, I had to get oral and topical antibiotics and buy an electric razor so that it never happens again.

I had my National Honor Society induction ceremony, and now I'm technically supposed to be done. But I'm not, because my high school is cool. Just like the school toying with my last day. I've worked hard this year so that I don't have to take finals, but the school thinks that it's best to make me be in the school while all the other seniors are taking their finals. Cool. I really don't want to go, but I will probably have to go anyway.

I took all my AP exams as well. I think that I did fantastic on my AP Literature test, but I d sections of it. My AP Spanish exam was easier than I thought it was going to be and I think that I did well, yet I'm still nervous as to what score I might get.

Now I am attempting to write my eight-page research paper on Anna Karenina, because I need a full rough draft for Monday...kill me. I have written two full pages and I have no clue where to go now...

Until the next post. Peace, love, y que todo vaya bien para vosotros.

Futuro...El Porvenir

2009-04-10T15:19:00.003-04:00

School is going to be ending soon for me. I'm starting to become more reflective and retrospective; I think more about the things I've done, the many lessons I've learned, the people who have helped me along the way, and I also look to the future.
While MHS has been a great outlet for testing my testimony and a great way for me to learn who I am. I have really come out of my shell while at MHS, in regards to social situations, and I am really happy that I've been able to do so. I've met a ton of really awesome people, mainly teachers, but a lot of my friends are really great, sometimes weird, but really great overall.
As I think about the life ahead of me, all i can think about is my impending voyage to BYU and my fast-approaching mission. I know that BYU is where I am supposed to go, and I now know what I'm going to study, however I am still a little nervous about the friends that I have yet to make. I ask myself constantly whether or not I'll be able to make such great friends as the friends I've been able to become so attached to out here. I also cannot believe that I'll actually be closer (in relative distance) to all my church friends, as the closest one lives three or four miles away.
Also, with regards to the whole mission thing...I was lying in my bed last night after my personal prayer, and before I fell asleep I realized something rather odd. I realized that in less than 9 months I can be turning in my papers, which mean that in less than a year's time I can know where I'll be serving my mission. I cannot wait, I'm thoroughly excited and wicked pumped for my mission...
As for life right now, all I can do is keep saing "Endure to the End" to myself. School is wicked boring and actually more like a chore for me now, which has never been the case for me. It's actually painful to be in that school now, I just want to be reading at home, or hangin' out with my cool mama. Argh....I have AP tests in less than a month......ew.
Oh well, as they say in Spain, "¡que todo vaya bien!"

18 Years

2009-03-09T21:25:00.003-04:00

If any of you have known me since my youth you would be just as amazed as I that I've made it this long! My parents probably thought I would die early on in life (someone tired of listening to me talk would silence me...hahaha).
But seriously, where has the time gone? I can remember moving into the Residence Inn and staying there for three months waiting for my house like it happened yesterday. I can remember the yellow bedroom with the animal wallpaper in my home in St. Louis and crying over leaving my beloved 2nd grade class as if it happened this very morning. I honestly cannot believe that I'm so old....
Saturday morning, my birthday, I awoke at around 7:45, prior to my family's "SURPRISE" awakening... As I was once again gaining consciousness I came to a strange realization. I realized that in a matter of months I will be leaving my family for good (basically). Christmas breaks and the couple of weeks that I'll be home before my mission (hopefully only a couple weeks) really do not constitute being home in my opinion. Sure I'll miss my family and the crazy chaos that is my life when I am doing things with them, but at the same time I'm so excited to leave. It'll be a good change and it'll be a great experience.
Another strange realization that I came to is that I have learned to love and embrace change. If anyone were to ask my mother what would happen when she would rearrange my pillows before bed one would wonder how I have come so far in such a short time. I constantly seek change, and lately I have embraced surprises...which still baffles my poor mother. I don't know when this change occurred but I honestly love it so much.
I have limited days left out here and I'm trying to learn to make the best of them. Making my days fun and relaxing helps them to pass much more quickly than they have been as of late (grammar?). Although all my classes are easy and I don't really get much homework, school is still the bane of my existence. I enjoy three of my six classes, and two of my six have big tests coming in about two months (AP Spanish and AP Lit exams). Argh! I just want it to end....but i know I can endure. Only 45 more days....

Blessings

2009-02-16T10:45:00.004-05:00

So, I've been very blessed in my life, and I think it takes a couple weeks of pure agony (waiting and waiting for things to happen) for me to realize that life is good. I was inspired by my sister's recent post about her life.

...I have a great family. Although they may drive me nuts sometimes (okay okay, so they drive me nuts constantly) I know that they back me in all I am, all I do, and all I want to be. They are one of the best support systems I have in my life besides the church and Christ.

...I have great leaders. I know that my leaders care about me and actually want me to succeed in life. In the past I may have complained a little about some of my old leaders, but the truth is that now I understand what I had to learn and why I needed to go through some of those experiences. It's amazing what a week of retrospection can do for a 17-almost-18-year-old.

...I love my Patriarchal Blessing. it;s possibly one of the coolest things that I own (next to my scriptures). It helps me all the time to know what I should be doing and where my life should be going. I love the knowledge that I am able to get from it whenever I think life is awful.

...I love the scriptures. It's been a recent thing for me, actual scripture study. I regret that I was never really into studying my scriptures previously, as do I regret my past for reading books in general.

...I LOVE BYU...okay, so I got into "BYU-the-provo" as Siovhan calls it. I was having a really rough week last week, and I was getting really tired of the day-to-day hassles of high school and life in general out here in this wasteland (i.e. small town Milford). Thursday night I was doing homework late (a.k.a. braden up until midnight due to concerts and appointments). I had this feeling to go on Facebook...i thought "Weird, but if God wants me to get on Facebook when I'm doing homework then fine!" One of my old friends updated his status to notify people he got in. So I was BeSmart.com in an instant, and then I was unable to breathe when I saw this...
It was such a great feeling. I ran in and told my parents, then I called my best friend, Siovhan. She was so excited for me, as was her friend and coworker Brandi.

...I love missionary work. Although none of my friends are ready to really har the gospel, I know that I can do my best to just be an example and just life righteously so that maybe in the future they can be ready and willing to accept the gospel. I also love serving with Elders in my area. They have such a love for the people out here, and they are great examples to me constantly of what I want to become (oh my...i turn 19 in 1 year and 2.5 weeks).

Well, when I think of more things I'm sure another post will come...and I hope all-a-y'all like the picture, as it's the first I've ever posted (I knew I needed to do it sometime, as my blog may look really boring).

Time

2009-01-25T20:58:00.002-05:00

Time always seems to escape me, and I always seem to neglect my poor blog! I'm sorry for all of you who act just like I do and get online and check my friend's blogs weekly, for I have not updated in about 2 months. I'll do a quick recap.
I had a lot of schoolwork to do in December, and lots of extra curricular activities. I'm so tired of those! Anyway, Christmas rolled around. It was a particularly tough time because I was missing my elder sister dearly. It was our first winter apart and I could feel my spirits sink a little. I was able to take a well-earned break and play video games and intently read my scriptures daily. Then January came. I got my Eagle Scout Award on my parent's 25th wedding anniversary. I was able to have a six day break from school for being smart! I had better than an 88 and had less than three absences in a majority of my classes so I was able to skip final exams. I got my wisdom teeth taken out and discovered that I would make and AWFUL A.) gie and B.) steroid user. I was given 'roids and high amounts of opioids to ease the pain and lessen the swelling.
Now to my life right now. It involves lots of praying, studying, and waiting. I think that the Lord might want me to learn a lot of patience for future events in my life. I have to wait for everything in my life and it is sheer agony. I have to wait to hear back from BYU Provo, although I did get into my safety, BYU Idaho. I have to wait to go on a mission....biggest. drawback. EVER. I enjoy preaching the gospel and helping others, and myself, come closer to our Father in Heaven. I know that I can take this time and spend it learning my scriptures and more about myself to make me a better missionary, so I'm trying to make the most of it. If anyone really wants to improve their relationship with Christ or Heavenly Father, I suggest taking time to read chapters four and six in Preach My Gospel. They are about recognizing and understanding the Spirit, and developing Christ-like attributes. I can see my life blesses daily from the studying that I do in these sections. All of PMG is wonderful. I am just reading those chapters right now and can see the benefits of doing so...I'm sure the others will help me more in the future.
That's my life right now in a nutshell. Hope you enjoy the update. There will be more in the future (as I am trying to keep a better "record" of my life). -B

Ohio and Gettysburg

2008-12-02T16:53:00.003-05:00

All last week I was pretty much stuck in a car. My family and I went to Ohio and Pennsylvania. We went to Gettysburg, PA to visit the historic battlegrounds and such, then we went to Columbus, OH to visit my extended family.
We arrived in Gettysburg around 7 o'clock on Monday evening. The whole town was pretty much closed, so we found a little hotel--a Holiday Inn--which was actually an old plantation-style home converted into a small hotel. We went to what we had assumed to be a quaint little down-home diner, but it turned out being a crappy town diner that wasn't as good as we thought it would be. We proceeded to walk around in the rain (I was coatless, wet, and starting to freeze) trying to see if there were any shops open. None were open at all, not even the fudge shop, which had a young woman in kneading fresh fudge just staring at us...sad. We went back to the "hotel" to enjoy hot showers and the floor (i.e. my bed). The next morning we went to the brand new "cyclorama" which is really just a giant museum with a huge mural in a rotunda that had sounds and everything! There were tons of cool artifacts and historical facts about the battles that took place in Gettysburg. It was a great museum and such a wonderfully awe-inspiring experience (despite all the fighting we children participated in).
Tuesday afternoon, after the museum, we drove straight on to Ohio. We arrived at my uncle's home at around 8 o'clock. We talked and goofed off for a while before my cousins had to go to bed (unfortunately they had school the next morning). So we went to bed too. The next morning we went into the city, Columbus, and we visited Ohio State University. We got into the football stadium and took some pictures quickly before getting discovered. Then we spent the rest of the day shopping and spending time at an arcade and laser tag game center (it was Mikaela's birthday and my uncle's birthday). The next day was Turkey Day!!! We ate such wonderful food (my mom and I wait for long periods of time to eat my aunt's delicious yam/sweet potato dish) and enjoyed sitting around just watching T.V. and playing games. There were lots of yummy pies and there was only one piece of cake left from the birthday celebration from the previous night...it was so amazing! The next day we went to Amish country to buy lots of cheeses, fudge, and breads. There was also a trip to a light show one night, but the exact day eludes me.
I absolutely loved the trip, even though I spent most of it fighting. :-( I ate so much food and loved hearing stories from my mom's and my uncle's childhood. It was my last trip for a Turkey Day celebration in Ohio...so I guess I tried to make the most out of it.

Quick

2008-11-30T23:48:00.002-05:00

Here's a quick post.
I was doing my homework and of course that lead me to go to lds.org...Anyway, I was on looking at some scripture stuff and I was brought to the "newsroom" section. I was fiddling around there and found this. I think that this is wonderful especially with all of the awful things happening all over Cali. I especially find it wonderful that the Catholic Diocese and another Catholic priest spoke about how people need to not seek to create more by being violent, and how the Mormons are not standing all alone on this belief. It's a great reminder that we can stand in high places and still be supported for it.
Hopefully I'll post more soon, I'm getting really lazy about this whole blog thing.

Life, Love, Loss

2008-10-29T22:31:00.003-04:00

It seems to me that every time I forget to update my blog it takes me weeks to update not only the posts, but the entire layout. I feel so far behind!
Here's a brief synopsis of how my life has been the past few weeks, and what I've been up to:
1. School-I always get inundated with my schoolwork so that by the end of the day I can be seen covered with papers half asleep in my room working on my essays and assorted homework assignments.
2.Activities-I am in so many clubs and participate in such a variety of activities that sometimes it's hard to keep track of what I'm supposed to do in a day. For example, on Mondays at 7:15 a.m. I have a Debate Club officers meeting in the Library of my school. Tuesdays I have mutual and I tend to get lots and lots of homework that I miraculously finish. Wednesdays I have Marching Band (a headache put to crappy show music). Thursdays I have Barbershop (a group of seven other boys and I get together and rehearse music a capella), then at night I have my Ballroom Dance class with some of my member friends. Fridays I generally have Marching Band commitments (football games). Saturdays I lounge around my house in sweats and sleep/read for a majority of the day. Sunday I get up watch a little bit of the news, take a shower, get dressed, go to church, bring the Sacrament to sick people, then have meetings and activities (SYC).
3.Life-Lately I've noticed how prevalent is. Just two weeks ago a dear friend's mother passed away, a friend of my just lost a greatly expected baby, and a wonderful man from my ward passed. A year ago another dear friend's daughter passed, and another really sick man in my ward passed away. I always new that was just around the corner, but because of all these experiences I've learned to live life the best I can, and live it to the fullest.
4.Spain-My school participates in a foreign exchange program every year, but this year it was different for me. I got so attached to all of the wonderful students that were here visiting from Valladolid, Spain. They thought that life out there was so perfect, so picture-esque, so High School Musical. It was so cute to see all of them so upset that they had to leave the "wonderful" high school with all the amazing things like lockers; they also didn't want to leave all the "huge" homes that they were staying in.
P.S. I've realized that I am so much like my mom that it's quite scary. We can sometimes finish each other's sentences, that is, if we havem't already said what they other was thinking/jsut about to say. It's kind of funny especially when my mom and I are talking to anyone else in our family (excluding Siovhan because she's like my mom too) and they fell as if they've missed something because mom and I just understand eachother. They generally do miss things too! ;-}

Eggs, Existentialism, and Egos...

2008-09-26T22:17:00.002-04:00

It's been a while since I posted my last entry. I need to keep better track of my blog (and reading all my friend's blogs).

I really like fried eggs. Random, I know. Today is my dad's birthday, and my mama's good to him. She made him, my entire family (including a seminary student) breakfast. We had eggs, bacon, home fries (with onions, peppers, and tomatoes), and toast. I love all of them, but mostly eggs. I don't know what it is, but I truly LOVE eggs. They always make me happy and make me remember the olden days (in my family), when we used to have eggs almost every Saturday morning. Now I'm lucky if I eat eggs once a month. Sure, they work their way into recipes and such, but nothing is as good as a plain-ol' fried egg. Mmmmmmm.

In my AP Lit class we've been doing a unit on Existentialism. My mom's not happy, mainly because I have become slightly indifferent about certain things now, and I kinda just do what I want to do when I fell like it. My teacher laughed when I told him the subtle changes I've started to notice since beginning The Stranger. He wonders if it's possible to have an Existentialistic Mormon (Mormonism and Existentialism...hmmm). Anyway, the book I've been reading, The Stranger, is a great book. I recommend it to anyone who wishes to step out of their comfort zone and take on this challenging story. There are a few (mainly only three) parts I edited for myself, and if you want to read it I would ask you to ask me which parts you'll need to skip.

I'm not egotistical, but I do sometimes seem very narcissistic. I like how I look, generally, I like my cute dimple (yes singular, I only really have one), I like my eyes, I like my laugh, and I like to smile. I do not like my smile right now (due to the metal in the mouth), but I do enjoy making others happy by smiling. All this was brought on by my choir practice on Wednesday. The male voices (comprised of the Tenors, Basses, and Baritones) went to do a sectional under the direction of our student section leaders. There are two section leaders for the three groups, but miraculously one of them took charge, again, unfortunately. He made many errors throughout the entire rehearsal but there are four main things that infuriated me:
1.) He yelled at ME! Someone asked me a question, and I said THREE words. There was a room full of people and he singled me out.
2.) he mocked me for being in the wrong spot. I am currently trading between two parts in choir, I'm switching between 1st Tenor and Baritone. That is not easy in and of itself, not to mention that I also have to remember with which section I need to be during each piece. I forgot that I was supposed to trade sections, so he told me that I need to not be so forgetful and just move because I was making him mess up his notes.
3.) He took charge. There are two section leaders, and he should have shared the power.
4.) He was toying with the tempo. That's the conductor's business. Not to mention, he took it very slow the first ten times we sang through the piece, then he sped the tempo up too much. He was confusing everyone in the room.
If I weren't a Senior with eight years of choir experience under my large belt, I would love to just quit. But I only have months left, so I'm not going to lose sleep over it.

I had my Senior pictures taken yesterday. I absolutely LOVED Hilton Photography Studios. My sister had her pictures done there, so my mom and I decided to go there again. The photographers were great, and I loved the flexibility that they gave me with the styles, etc. I highly recommend, to anyone living in MA to consider letting Hilton photograph their children. It was a great studio. Maybe my experience would've been different if I didn't have a very attractive young woman taking my pictures. But, anyway, I loved the whole experience, and I'm sure I will share pictures (after I pick which ones I want) with y'all.

School, Science, Split...BOOM!

2008-09-20T22:35:00.003-04:00

So my life is like a giant pot of pasta right now. Everything was starting to become great and rather comfortable in my life when everything was stirred and churned.
School has started. Fun, NOT! I enjoy all of my classes and most of them are very interesting. I'm currently taking AP Literature, AP Spanish Language, Band, Chorus, P.E., and Chemistry. AP Lit is great class for me because I am able to delve into books to a depth I was not able to do in any previous English class. AP Spanish is just fun, sometimes. We do a lot of skits, we read a lot of stories, and we get to learn Spanish in a fun environment. Band and Chorus are interesting (like always), and they allow me to learn and grow in many different ways. Update!!! I'm now 4th chair (out of 7) and that's great because last year I was 7th out of 8 (also I forgot to practice for my audition so I could have been 3rd if I'd only practiced). Now Chemistry. I am the only Senior in my chem class, mainly because my old guidance counselor told me to take whatever science I wanted to take my junior year, so I took Anatomy and Physiology instead of Chemistry. My class is awkward because my entire class is filled with weird kids and they NEVER TALK!!! If you really know me, you know that I utter silence (in public places). I like it when classes are engaging and fun, but this one is neither. I am generally the first one to give an answer, whether I'm right or wrong, and so my classmates not only think I'm weird, but most of them believe I am slightly stupid. My teacher understands that I'm actually (I'm not being proud...) one of the smartest kids in the class. I understand all of the material faster than almost all the other students, and I know a fare share about Chemicals and Elements (more than the rest of the class). I'm okay with everyone thinking me a fool, as long as the teacher knows who the real smart kids are...;-]
Now the most recent, and slightly more traumatic change in my life. So, my old Young Men's Presidency was released and a new one was called, it was great, but I'll miss my old leader. That wasn't the traumatic change; however, my ward being split into two units was. Last Sunday my ward, the Franklin Ward, was split into the "Franklin 1st Ward" and "Franklin 2nd Branch". All of my good friends from my quorum are not in the Ward with me, and most of my leaders and friends are no longer with me either. It's very upsetting being taken away from all those that I've lived, grown, and been accustomed to for the past 10 years. I know that this is what Heavenly Father and Christ want right now, but it is hard to just swallow it and move on.
Now I'm starting to settle in and become used to the sea of change that's around me. I only hope that things won't be too weird in church tomorrow.

Fiends and Friends

2008-08-25T12:05:00.004-04:00

Sometimes friends are not friends. Sometimes friends are fiends and they do things that are absolutely malicious. I wonder how children raised by generally good people can be so rude and thoughtless towards others.

If everyone in the world actually listened to each other, without ignoring what they're really saying, what would the world be like?

I would like it if people didn't accept friends like they do car offers, OBO (or better offers). My parents have raised me to treat others with respect and be a man of my word, to follow through with commitments. I it when people break commitments and I also people who don't honor their word, people who aren't honest...people who don't have integrity. I like it when my friends are with me, but when they make plans with others after making plans with me, I generally just say it's OK. Not anymore! I will not let others walk all over me and take advantage of me. I have changed this summer, I'm trying to be more honest about how I feel and what I think.

A good thing did happen today. I fixed my schedule and got to see a lot of my friends at school. That made me happy. But then I got home and discovered that some of my church friends, who must inherently be stupid, treated my brother like a bad offer on a car. They found a better offer of entertainment, so they disregarded his offer. I just wanted to go over there and beat the snot out of them, or ask their parents why their children are so rude.

I wish that other teenage boys could just understand that despite their lack of emotions and feeling, others still have feelings. Some teenage boys, mainly the ones in my ward, are generally emotion retarded, literally. They are slow to understand emotions, and I don't think they
really care. Frankly their immaturity, idiocy, and unorganized natures make me want to vomit sometimes...

Siovhan tells me that someday I will be appreciated by people other than my family. I'm anxiously awaiting that day. She told me that at BYU, you can be yourself all the time and that people are OK with that. I having my "school Braden" and "church Braden". I want my church friends to accept the fact that I like to know things, I like to learn. I want my school friends to know that I love my religion with all my heart and soul, and that I cannot live without being, as they call me, "Mormon Braden". I just wish life wasn't so complicated and that things were easier for me sometimes. I know that I need to go through Hell to get to Heaven, and that hopefully I'll be blessed for all my many trials.
-B

The Long Month...Crash

2008-08-24T23:10:00.006-04:00

So it's been a while since I last posted anything. I'll do an update and a little bit of babbling...I'm a little emotional (school starts soon).

After my last post I didn't do much. Mom, Ben, and Mikaela left before the last week of July to go out to Utah, so I was home with my dad. It was nice being alone for a little while. I went to Especially for Youth (efy) in Amherst, MA and I had a blast! it was seriously the best efy I've ever been to, and I learned so much and had a lot of humbling, spiritual moments. I really liked the female counselor in my group...she was more mature than the male counselor i was assigned to, and she was very nice (she listened to me which is hard to do). I met some wonderful people that live relatively close to me, so i can stay in contact with them, maybe i'll even be able to have a little reunion or something.

After i got back form efy i went through some awful efy withdrawals. I was depressed and moped-around all day Saturday and Sunday. Then I spent the week reading my books for the Advanced Placement Literature class I'm attempting to get into. I didn't get very far, but I finished one. Then that Friday (8/8/08) I was driving home after being with the Elders in our ward all day and I totaled my dad's Volvo S70. I rear-ended someone going about 10 m.p.h. But that scar's still a little tender.

I flew out to Utah that Tuesday night. I had a 9-hour layover in Dallas Airport, and when I got to Utah it was noon-ish. I went to Siovhan's apartment to pack all of her belongings into my grandpa's truck, then go to meet with a BYU admissions counselor to talk about the admissions process and such. He was impressed with everything that I was juggling, and said that i was a shoe-in...HA! He said that i was a very strong candidate...so i hope he was being brutally honest. After that i went to Nephi to visit the grandparents. Thursday of that week was Siovhan's graduation (Step 1), and that was long...but worthwhile. Richard G. Scott gave a speech after being awarded and honorary Doctorate, and he talked about the steps to true success in life (will be posted after i find the notes i took). It was wonderful, and also the speech given by a wonderfully bright English major was magnificent. I don't know how else to describe it! We had a party at her complex where we rented "The Lodge" so that everyone could come and back in Siovhan's many success. Siovhan's CFAC convocation (College of Fine Arts and Communications) was absolutely amazing (Step 2). There was a speech given about Journalism, Advertising, Movie Production, and Graphic Arts majors and how exciting and amazing they all are. There were some music majors who did a trio with a violin, oboe, and piano...that was marvelous. It really made me want to go into the Fine Arts and Communications field.

After that we went to my Aunt AnnMarie's house to eat lunch. Then we headed-off to Eugene, Oregon (Or-i-gehn) for those new-englanders who cannot pronounce it). We stopped in Twin Falls, ID to eat at a great restaurant called Jaker's. Great food and relatively good prices. We stopped somewhere for the night and then continued-on in the morning. We got lost in Hell...well that's what i called it because it was 109º and i kept passing-out from heat exhaustion. After tacking-on an extra 4 (or more) hours on to our already 15-hour drive, we gor to Eugene. My family went looking for apartments whilst i was reading two more books. I finished and turned in my homework late (yet my teacher still cares about me...odd). Tuesday night (8/19/08) we went to a pizza/arcade place that Siovhan's Branch President owns. We said good-bye there at the parlor before we each drove separate ways (all eyes teared-up) . We arrived in Kaysville, UT (Wednesday night) to stay at my Aunt Kimberly's parents' home. It was wonderful, but we had leave at 11 the next morning. We didn't get back till 2 a.m. Friday morning, and that was FUN! I'm still currently stuck in Pacific Time and school starts on Tuesday.....

I am tired of people taking advantage of me.I'm tired of getting told who i should date, that's my choice. If i don't want, or am not permitted, to date certain people i should not be told to date them. My happiness is important while I'm , right? If I'm not going to be happy at all certain people, I won't do it. People need to grow up...seriously.
-B

Of Young Men and Missionaries

2008-07-18T10:11:00.003-04:00

Okay, so it's been almost a month since the last post. I think it's time for an update.

I have been called to be the Quorum Mission Leader for my ward's Priest Quorum. With this title comes a lot of work and responsibility. Every week I have to ensure that each boy in my quorum has the opportunity to serve a minimum of six hours with the Elders serving in our ward. Also, mainly because I tend to be the most organized of my quorum, the Bishop asks me to help plan a variety of things.

The boys seem to really not like to do things out of their comfort zones. It is hard to spend 6 hours with 2 19-21 year-old boys that you don't even know, yet the boys in my quorum are not even trying to make an effort to go out with the Elders. Most of them just make excuses and chicken-out the last minute so then I have to call the Elders to tell them that the boy just canceled on me and there isn't another boy to go with them. That makes me angry, I don't want to be the one to tell the Elders that another boy didn't follow through, maybe I'll just have the boys call the Elders and tell them themselves.

Anywho, I have a great time whenever I go out with the Elders. Over the past month I have probably gone out a total of 31 hours. It would be closer to 45 or 50 if my family didn't get upset when I have the car for hours on end! Although it may be a lot of work, this calling is fun. The Elders that come to our ward (no matter where they were before) are always funny, fun to be around, and very spiritual. It never ceases to surprise me that whenever I'm with them, I feel the Spirit in abundance. I now just want to go on mission right now, although it's not possible. I love going out with the missionaries because I feel the Spirit so strongly when I'm with them. But alas, I have 2 more years left to wait!!!

I went to Youth Conference on the 10-12 of this month. It was so much fun! There were definitely some low-lights to the trip but the good outweighed the bad in this situation. The first night was bad, I was only able to get 4.5 hours of sleep and that, in the words of my sister, was no bueno. Then I attempted to sleep on the bus, but obnoxious s sitting behind me would not stop talking and laughing for 10 minutes so that I could fall asleep. The Pageant was great, but nothing has changed in like 3 years so it was the same. The night of the 11th the stake youth went to Keuka College (a tiny, dingy, weird college in Boringsville upstate New York). I got about 5.5 hours of sleep that night and had fun climbing on the roof of the dorms where I was staying (and sneaking over at 6:30 am to awaken my brother and scare the snot out of him). Then we went to the Sacred Grove. It was a lot of fun, except for an annoying from my ward who kept telling people that we are not supposed to talk (at ALL!!!) because the place was so sacred we shouldn't even whisper. Gosh, some people's children! After the testimony meeting, we loaded-up on the buses and started going home. I wasn't able to get very much sleep for 2 reasons: 1. Every time I would fall asleep, someone would kick something around me and I would wake up, and 2. I am on the SYC (Stake Youth Council) and the old SYC members wouldn't do anything that the leaders would want them to do, instead they would tell the leaders that we (the new SYC) needed to take charge and do what they wanted. So what did that mean with 4 other new SYC members on the bus??? It meant that I did all the work! Sure, it wasn't a lot, but it didn't help that any time I would try to get the group's attention, the last ones to stop talking were those very people.

That's been my life for the pat month! It really isn't as boring as it sounds. I just can't wait till I go out to Utah (and Vegas!) to see my sister! Also, school starts in just over a month, that is weird. Senior Year, the final frontier (of high school that is).

Too Fast

2008-06-20T22:45:00.001-04:00

So a month has flown by since I last posted. Wow, time seems to really fly by. I will do a recap of my past month so bear with me.
After my last post, I started going to practices for a select band that plays for the main Senior events at the school. I had about two weeks of twice-a-week practice and then we had to play at the never-ending Senior Awards night. The program was in total approximately 2 hours long! Just for awards and scholarships that only a handful of people really got, mainly the Valedictorian).
Then there was graduation. Graduation was June 1st, and it was wonderful. The speeches were not all clichéd and full of nostalgia like the past four years worth of speeches, but they were filled with hope and energy. Hope and energy about the future. The graduating class didn't (and i doubt they do now) know what the future really has in store for them. The ceremony was outside this year, the first year in six (as stated by Mr. Brucato).
I had finals. Well that's just it, I had two. One in my Spanish 5 class, and one in my Anatomy and Physiology class. The other days were either days where I didn't have to come into school, half days, of days filled with study classes (to prepare for the "difficult" finals.
It is now summer. I have been called to be the "Quorum Mission Leader" and part of the Priest Quorum Presidency. I am in charge of the helping the Priests in the ward to get out and help do missionary work. I am on-call with the missionaries, seeing as I have no job, and I go whenever they need me. I have only been called once with week, but I hope that I will be called more often (it's actually rather fun).
I am getting my Duty to God Award in sacrament meeting on Sunday and am giving a talk about my experience in the program as a result. I have been waiting to actually receive the award for about two or three weeks now and I am happy that I don't have to wait any longer. I am going to wait to receive my Eagle award (I am an Eagle scout, but I have not had the ceremony yet) until the end of summer so that my family can come and see me get the award.
That is the best recap that I can do right now, it's late and have a lot of stuff to do tomorrow. -B

Two Weeks

2008-05-16T22:46:00.002-04:00

These past two weeks have been so chaotic. I have felt trapped in constant and tremendous drama and chaos. Trapped between comfort and fun. Tossed between groups of friends like a ship in stormy waters. It will all be worth the waiting and pseudo-patience that I try to exert. And mom, I do try to be patient, but a LOT of my patience goes to my school day, so I will try harder. Especially now that seminary's almost over, for now I can get more sleep!
I had my real SAT test on the 3rd, and that was rather easy. I'm supposed to be able to check my scores this coming week, then I can see whether I'm in the clear, or thrown back into more standardized test taking. Then, I had some late orchestra practices to go to for the concert on the 8th.
On the 9th and 10th, I went on my first white-water rafting trip in up-state New York. The rapids were class 3's and class 4's. It was so much fun, and not as nerve-racking as I had believed they would be.
I had band after school twice this week, as well as a concert on the 13th. I got my varsity letter for participating in Marching Band for three years. I also got my Tenor pin, and my Clarinet pin.
Yesterday I had another orthodontist appointment. Dr. Gamm, my orthodontist, stopped all of my elastics. Meaning that my mother no longer has to walk around the house and find tiny little broken pieces of rubber wherever she walks. He also said that my teeth look great, excellent is what he said, and that I might get them off before next school year!!! (I will get pictures up soon!)
I have 2 proms coming up really soon. Milford High School's Senior Prom is this coming Friday, and I'm going with one of my friends, AJ Bruce. I'm looking forward to another great Senior Prom (this is #2). I am going to Fall River High's Senior Prom with a gal from the Fall River Branch, Leslie Mello. I'm a little apprehensive for this particular one, for I don't know any of her school friends and do not want to be embarrassing (well, really, how can I be embarrassing?).

Subtleties

2008-04-29T16:14:00.002-04:00

I have noticed lately that I have the ability to notice a lot of things about people that most other people never really notice. For instance, I am able to see when people are struggling, even if they put on a happy face and try not to show it. It pains me to see people hurting inside because at one point in my life I could relate, but now I know that there is more to life than problems and we just have to look past them. I am also able to notice when people just need someone to talk to or when someone just needs another person there with them. I can also tell certain things about people that I know just by looking in their eyes. Weird, I know, but it is true (at least I think so).

Okay, a little update on the schooling. I am the Vice-President of Debate Club, running for Vice-President of Spanish National Honor Society, and in the fall I will be running for President of the Music Department of MHS. I did not win the elections for Treasurer of NHS, but that is completely fine. In fact, that might even be better because now I can run for President of the Music Department.

I am also waiting for my mother and father to decide whether or not we will all be going to Utah and changing all of the plans for the summer. I really do not care if go out to Utah because then we would be able to go to Cali for my first time! However, I really do want to do a great High Adventure event and Youth Conference for the stake. -B

Senior Prom(s)

2008-04-14T16:46:00.001-04:00

The past two weeks have been rather busy.

After prom, not much happened, for a while that is. One week flew by, and now the second week flew by. My AP Language and Composition gave her resignation notice to the school and she will be leaving the Milford school system in June. I took the ACT exams on April 12th, they were a little bit more difficult than I thought they would be. I also aced my two big Spanish tests last week, I also aced the hardest test of the year in Anatomy (the test on the brain and the nervous system).
I was also elected the Vice-President of my high school's newly started debate club. I am helping to get it going so that it will be even more popular in the years to come. I had a National Honor Society meeting today, and I am running for the position of Chapter Treasurer. The elections will be Monday , April 28th and then I will find out whether I made it or not.
I am also going to run for President of the National ure & Languages Honor Society (something to that extent). I really would like to be the President, not to mention it would be a lot of fun.
-B

Dates, Braces, School

2008-03-27T21:52:00.004-04:00

Here is a little bit of a journal entry.

I went on a date last night with my friend Carly from the Boston Stake, and I doubled with my friend Ryan from my ward. His date was was our old teacher's quorum advisor's sister, she was out visiting from Utah. We went to T.G.I. Fridays and then went to Carly's house to get some ice-cream and so that I could finally meet her parents.
Prom is tomorrow night for me, and I'm bringing my best friend Mia Hansen (a freshman at BYU-Idaho). After Prom, we are going to go back to my place and her brother, Ryan, is going to come over and eat some Chinese Food with the rest of my family, well those that are still alive.

I had another Orthodontic appointment, and I got another "GOOD" for my brushing and flossing! If i get four more, I can get a free $10 gift card to some store of my choice! YAY! I have now reverted back to the age of ten! Actually my orthodontist Dr. Benjamin Gamm is really amazed at how fast my teeth move, I do not believe that I will have them on for much longer.

I have a few more tutoring sessions before I take my SAT tests. I'm now trying to fit the sessions into my JV Boys Tennis schedule, and that is not an easy task. Also, I have All School Orchestra rehearsals some Thursday nights, some dance classes on Friday nights, and then I try to squeeze in some family and friend time. Oh, I also have some National Honor Society meeting to go to before the induction ceremony on April 30th.

I am also almost completely done with my Duty to God Award and should be able to get in within the month of April. I am done with all of my Eagle Rank stuff. I am now just waiting and waiting, somewhat patiently.

I think that is all I have going on right now, besides trying to plan out my summer and trying to find a summer job.

Dear Life (#3)

2008-03-25T14:52:00.006-04:00

In honor of my dear sister, Siovhan, I shall do a post just like hers.

Dear MCAS,
Thank-you for being so bothersome. Last year I did have to take you, and I passed you with flying colors. This year you are not a burden though, I can now get an extra 1-3 hours of sleep! Also, I get to tease the Freshman and the Sophomores!!!

Dear Allergies,
Oh how I loathe you so. Why must you inflict my body with such nastiness. I how much I have to scratch myself just to alleviate the itchiness. Also, why must I have itchy eyes? It makes it difficult to see with my contact lenses in my eyes.

Dear Life (#2)

2008-03-23T23:03:00.007-04:00

Dear Life,

You were fair to me this week. You did force me to face many trials, yet you offered me many opportunities. So i would like to thank you, life.

Thanks for putting me on Junior Varsity Boys tennis, for now I can find more time do spend with my friends and family. Thanks for introducing me to some wonderful young women Friday night. Thanks for allowing me to learn more about Christ today durring third hour at church. Thanks for letting Sister Donahue be my teacher, she is such a wonderful person. Thanks for such wonderful parents, who care about me so much. Thanks for friends who are kind and compassionate.

Thanks for everything. -B

Dear Life (#1)

2008-03-22T09:12:00.004-04:00

Dear Life,
Why must you be so difficult? Throwing twists and turns into every blissful lane of life. Why must you turn simple situations, events, and relationships so complex? I do need to thank you life, for you do provide some quite tremendous brief moments amidst such confusing times. Why do my friends finally understand me? How long does it tke for people to understand one another more fully?

Dear Spanish 5,
Why are you such an easy class? Your homework such a joke. The classwork, why so much? I just want to stay with me so that I can transition to AP Spanish easier. Not to mention I do need you to teach me the Past Subjunctive tense.

Dear Anatomy Class,
Why do the cats have to smell when they are being cut to pieces? Why does the cat fur seem to fly EVERYWHERE? The tests are easy, the memorization, BAH! All in all you are an easy class.

Dear Music Classes,
Why so much work? What are the other music interns doing, and why am i getting recognized by the choir and band directors finally after three years of hard work?

Dear Tennis,
Why have you let me down again? It might be for the best, because now I can actually have a life!

In a way, I thank you life, for all that you give me (even the bad stuff).